frogs and snails and puppy-dog's tails AND sugar and spice and everything nice!

family first

2011-10-01T21:12:00.000-04:00

today we ventured north to ellijay, ga for some apple picking!! i have been looking forward to this trip for quite a few weeks and anticipated both its joy and satisfaction for all. little bb had a blast! having watched one too many episodes of curious george and the apple barn, he knew exactly what to do! he spotted the processing room right away...noticing the apples coming off the belt, being bagged, etc. to his dismay (i assume) we did not witness the juicing of apples to make both apple juice and/or cider, as they do on curious george, although the "general store" carried both. to MY dismay, we forgot to try the apple cider doughnuts! brayden LOVED it though. not only did he find it hillarious seeing daddy jump to pick jumbo red romes left at the treetops, but he picked a few himself, he shot an apple canon, walked through a petting farm and proudly named each animal, and passed at the chance for a hayride because he was too pooped from walking the orchards and searching for apples. in fact, he asked for "home." we picked mostly red rome, with a few golden delicious, fuji, and maybe some winesaps and braeburns mixed in. i'm honestly not sure of some of the red varieties because at one point, i took brayden by myself while chris fed little miss and we wandered in between rows instead of going up and down and paying attention to the signs. hmmm... oh well. i was really just trying to hurry and fill the bag! both kids fell asleep on way there and both fell asleep on way home. nice job mom and dad! :)

good-bye summer, hello pre-school!

2011-09-22T21:26:00.000-04:00

when you have a baby in the summer, it's not very fun or fair for the older sibling because in the killer heat of summer, all you feel like doing is staying inside...and the LAST thing you feel like doing is 1) putting on a swimsuit, and 2) see yourself in it! BUT...Brayden and I did have one last hurrah at a neighbor's pool before he started school.

Brayden is now attending pre-school at a local church 2 days a week and LOVES it!! We are more than pleased with the program and what he is learning. He comes home with new words and phrases each day. The other morning he woke up and immediately asked for a snack. When I told him it was 7am and time for breakfast, he said "okay, cool!" The 3 hour naps when he gets home are an added bonus too :). Tonight, he had a "date with Dad" sponsored by the school, and presented Chris with a plate he'd made with his handprint on it. We love the social and academic exposure he is getting at such a young age!

At 6 weeks Neely showed significant signs of improvement. As a result we were on our way to establishing a routine and getting on a schedule. So...we gladly dropped the kids off with Grandma and Grandpa and took off on a date. We enjoyed wandering around Dahlonega for the day and touring Three Sisters Vineyard.

blessings

2011-09-21T20:48:00.000-04:00

wow! I had no idea sweet nee-nee would be 3 months old by the time i finally got on to blog about how life has changed, how much we love her adorable chubby cheeks, and how grateful we are that our GREAT GOD spared her life so that we could know her, love her, and tell Brayden not to bounce the basketball on her head! I have literally written 15-20 blog posts in my mind, titled them, edited them, and then considered what a great invention it would be if a machine existed that could transcribe my thoughts to paper/the computer. But, alas, it does not, and so, I am simply very, very behind in this online journal of our lives as a family of now four.

I've been thinking alot lately about Laura Story's song Blessings. We are lucky enough to have Laura as one of our main worship leaders at our church here in Atlanta. I was introduced to the song just after the test that seemed to indicate Neely would have a chromosomal abnormality and may not survive the pregnancy. A dear friend asked me if I'd heard it and encouraged me to listen closely to its lyrics, praying that I would be strengthened and comforted by its message. I've included the lyrics below.

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching(s) of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise

We'd waited 10 long months to meet Neely and had watched God perform more than one miracle in saving her life! She was beautiful! She was perfect! She was healthy! She was "a fighter, a champion" and she was finally here...with us. We were grateful. And then everything drastically changed...the first night home from the hospital she literally cried for 9 hours straight!! And that was the beginning... The whole first month was horrible. She screamed and cried for 6-8 hrs a day and nothing would calm her--not the swing, not the bouncer, not the mobile hanging over the pack-n-play, not the paci, NOTHING!! By nighttime, thankfully, she would sleep 4-5 hours because she was so exhausted from her daytime rants. Although it was clear her tummy was the problem, we could not pinpoint the issue. Naturally, all of my confidence went out the window...my hopes of quickly having her on a schedule, establishing her routine, breastfeeding longer with her than with Brayden (by controlling my migraines--what a joke!), and easily transitioning her into our family. Praise God for friends who brought meals because I was constantly dealing with an upset baby. Sweet Brayden transitioned beautifully, except for one week of throwing toys and hitting furniture, as if to say "I've had it with this crying! Could someone please show ME some attention?!" After stripping nearly everything from my diet, we finally figured out that she was having to work too hard to digest the lactose from the milk. When the doctor suggested we try Similac Sensitive, we said, "YES! Anything!" It was literally an overnight miracle!!! She was suddenly content, happy, calm, satisfied, quiet, could sleep, would sleep...I was shocked! In truth, I did not think it was possible. I'm embarrassed now to admit it, but I honestly was worried that she would never smile, would never like the bouncy seat or the swing, that she would be a fussy baby, inconsolable, and I was going to have to figure out how to live with this miserable crying for the next year of my life, and figure out how to smile about it because that's what everyone expects you to do...Smile! You have a new baby!

Underneath all of the circumstance though, I could sense Jesus calling...calling me to come and sit at His feet, to take His yoke "because it is easy and His burden is light." And in those quiet moments of desperation and fear, when I lay wide awake in the dark at night, wondering what the next day would bring, I had nothing left to do but cry out for help, for strength, for perseverance, for wisdom, for deliverance. We were at the end of ourselves. No booksmarts or prior experience seemed to matter at that point; we simply needed Jesus to intervene our hearts and calm our fears and graciously give us whatever we needed to care for Neely and to love her in the process. And it's these moments that remind us that "this is not our home." This is where the song comes in. All my life I've prayed for "blessings" and I interpret those blessings to mean "good" things, and there's not necessarily anything wrong with that, but at my core I also want life to be easy and I want to be happy; I don't want to suffer and somewhere I think I "deserve" that. But God in His goodness interprets blessings different than me, so He challenges my so-called life of ease so that I will cry out for help in the middle of night, so that I will experience need. Now, looking back, the beauty of those moments is that I was confident of Christ's presence then more than ever, and yet I was so desperate for the circumstances to change. Life this side of eternity will not get better. If anything, the longer we walk with Jesus, it will only get harder. This should increase our longing for heaven, when pain and suffering will finally be no more. I look at Neely now and you would NEVER know that she was so much work in the beginning. I look at her and see a life so precious, a life we almost never knew and am beyond words in expressing just how grateful we are that she is here to grace us with her bright, beaming smile! She is an absolute doll! She is filled with smiles, giggles even, and so full of life. In some ways I feel like I am trying to make up for lost time with her each time we snuggle or play. She is quite the active child and we're all convinced she'll by walking by 9 or 10 months, unlike her big-headed brother Brayden, who didn't walk until 17 months! What a gift, a blessing she is in our lives...a reminder each day of God's presence, faithfulness and goodness!

Proud, curious big brother

She's HERE!!!

2011-06-28T13:35:00.002-04:00

Neely Jane Phillips entered the world on June 15, 2011 at 1:06 pm, weighing 7 lbs and measuring 18 3/4" long. We are grateful and overjoyed to finally see her sweet face and hear her cries of life! She is welcomed by mommy and daddy and big brother Brayden!!

Sittin' on ready...

2011-06-13T14:57:00.005-04:00

36 weeks

38 weeks

The counters are sealed, the floors mopped and vacuumed, all is dusted and windexed, clothes have been laundered, diapers stocked, bottles and paci sterilized, fridge and pantry stocked, and clean sheets and towels laid out for mom and dad when they get here. We are ready! In just 2 short days we will welcome little Neely Jane into the world. We are so ready to meet this precious child whom God has spared and granted life. My doctor has said for the past several ultrasounds that she appears to be very healthy, active and have lots of hair. I am selfishly hoping of course that she has a head full of dark hair, with dark eyes to match! More seriously, we are praying that she WILL be healthy, with no complications during or after the birth. Her nursery is all finished and big brother Brayden is excited to meet the cause of the bulge in mommy's tummy. Check back for updates...we will post as soon as we are able. Praise be to God for this little miracle!!

You're 2!!!

2011-06-01T14:23:00.005-04:00

Happy 2nd Birthday to our little boy! Time flies, doesn't it?! What a joy and privilege (and challenge) it has been to learn how to care for you, love you, parent you, and teach and train you. You are a remarkable little boy...our own "curious george" we like to say.

At two years old, you weigh 29.5 lbs and are 35.5" tall. You wear a size 7 shoe and seem to outgrow your shoes within 1-2 months of purchase. You are jabbering all the time, 50% of which is unidentifiable speech. It makes perfect sense to you, but we often struggle to understand what you're asking or saying. You love to ask where something or someone is..."where'd it go?", "Where da ball?", "Where pot (Spot)?", etc... You still love books and we love to see you "read" to yourself, asking questions about what you might see on a page and answering yourself too. You've figured out that "please" is what Mommy and Daddy want to hear, so you say it all the time, especially when YOU want something...doesn't always work! You've also figured out how to say the "sh" sound, so can now say "show" and not only hand us the remote, but jump up and down screaming "show, show, show!" This, too, doesn't always work...but it is cute! You love to brush your teeth, and having mastered the alphabet, are learning your shapes, colors and numbers. You can count to 4 when concentrating and know most primary colors. Although, when in doubt, the color is always blue! We've started asking who made you and you answer "Gawd," and this absolutely melts our hearts. You are still a pistol when it comes to night-night though. Sometimes you will go straight to bed after brushing teeth, reading books and saying prayers, and other nights, you are determined to get up 10x and open your door and "cry" for one of us to come get you. This earns you a spanking as we are teaching you to stay in your bed, that it is time to sleep, not play. You say "whee" as you come down the stairs each morning and run usually straight to the back door, desiring to play outside at 7am. You love to color! You have improved so much in holding the crayons and making large, dark scribbles on the page. You've also broken almost all of your crayons, necessitating Mommy to buy new ones. Hands down, spaghetti is still your favorite meal and you are doing so well with the fork. You are also a milk machine! I try to get you to drink more water, but you are constantly asking for "mickle, mickle," while running to the fridge. You have finally learned to love the tube slide at Chick-fil-a. Having braved it by yourself the first time a few days ago, you cannot get enough of its fun, and we LOVE to see the bright smile and hear the giggles as you come down.

Happy 2nd Birthday Brayden! We love you oh so much and thank God for the precious little boy you are. He has fashioned you so perfectly, so creatively, so wonderfully. We look forward to many more years of watching you grow and develop and pray that at a young age, you would choose Jesus to be King of your heart. We are so proud of you!

-Mommy and Daddy

c-section it is!

2011-05-20T13:41:00.002-04:00

June 15th we will have our baby girl!! At least, that's the plan... Since Neely is still breech and seems packed in there, my doctor and I decided to go ahead and schedule the c-section, so that a)hopefully I can get an early morning time slot, and b)if she does turn, however unlikely, we can cancel the surgery. We will re-evaluate at 37 weeks when I see Dr. Gomez again, my perinatologist, for my final ultrasound. As much as I would prefer Neely to turn, it's kind of nice knowing what to expect and having the luxury of putting a plan in place. If she is delivered on June 15th, Neely and Brayden will be exactly 2 yrs and 2 wks apart. I think we're seeing joint birthday parties in their future :). In the meantime, I am beginning to taste the sentiments of "let's get this party started." I am feeling ready to be done with pregnancy...not at my wits end, but just very uncomfortable and ready to sleep on my stomach again! The technician who did my scan this week said Neely already has lots of hair (I so hope it's dark!) and weighs close to 6 lbs!! She also appears very active and healthy. We are so grateful and can't wait to meet her.

sneak peek

2011-05-19T12:54:00.007-04:00

So the pictures I was sure wouldn't turn out, ended up being fantastic!!! Thank you to my sweet friend Lindsay at a.d. photography for capturing quick moments on film that ended up being precious! Here is a sneak peek into some of those moments:

Hormones at their HIGHEST...

2011-05-19T11:53:00.005-04:00

Every once in a while I do something and think, "that was a really dumb decision." Today was one of those days. Chris and I have been going back and forth about sending Brayden to 2 year old pre-school next year, 2 or 3 days a week. He is so active, friendly, inquisitive, and BUSY. I thought the stimulation would be good for him, not to mention the social outlet. There is a pre-school program at a nearby Methodist church that has had rave reviews. Coincidentally, my neighbor teaches a class of 2 year olds there and LOVES the program. Even at two, they begin working on phonics with the A Beka curriculum and have daily "specials" where they spend time focusing on either learning Spanish, music, or art. Additionally, there is a Bible story focus each week and at Chapel, the puppet team acts out the Bible story, placing emphasis on the verse and character trait of the week. In all, it seems like a great program...a nice mix of structure and play time.

WELL TODAY we went for a tour. WHY ON EARTH DID I TAKE BRAYDEN WITH ME??? I took him because I didn't have a choice AND because when I called, the lady on the phone told me that he would be more than welcome...he could run on the playground, play in one of the classrooms, whatever the case he would be welcome and right at home! WELL...because another parent was late to the tour, we waited 15 minutes in the lobby, which means idle time for a 2 year old, and here the story begins. After trying to pull crayons and mini school buses off of a floral display, he began running into different offices finding all sorts of interesting objects to remove from desks...pens, paper, white out, a bouncy ball, a foam set of letters... These I had to retrieve to place back on various desks. Then he took off down the hall where the classrooms are and wanted to play with the other boys and girls, only he's not a student and the tour STILL HASN'T EVEN STARTED!!! I started to stress, sweat, and generally feel annoyed. I tried putting him in his stroller...which is such a joke to any mom of a 2 year old boy when there are colorful objects and other children around with whom they can play. This was a disaster. I stood trying to listen attentively and ignore my now screaming child as he attempted to throw himself and the stroller on the floor. I am ultra sweating by now and can feel the eyes of other moms staring at me as if there's SOMETHING I should be doing. This is when my defenses kick in...WHAT EXACTLY am I to do? He is a 2 year old toddler, cutting molars, wants to roam and look at all things new and different and simply will not stand still or sit down when I want him to. OF COURSE HE WON'T...but somehow I thought "he would be welcome and right at home." Once we get into an actual classroom, he is free...he can play with the tambourine, the dinosaurs, the kitchen, the clock, but what does he instead find alluring? Someone else's Spiderman lunch box, the crayons that have no paper on which to color, the teacher's leftover coffee from earlier that morning, and a bin of papers that would make a nice mess if dumped on the floor! Seriously, only about 10 minutes into the tour had passed and I was EXHAUSTED. The other little boy, younger than Brayden, stood quietly with his mom, holding her hand and seemed content to stand there without making a SOUND! The mother of course kept looking at me, as if curiously wondering why I couldn't control my child. The other mom looked at me like she pitied me for my wild child. My pride was right in my face. I wanted to say, "he must not be very active," or "you just wait until he turns two," or "he seems awfully shy" (boring was actually what I was thinking). I had to repent for my selfish, judgemental, pride preserving thoughts and THEN we went to the playground....

Brayden took off faster than I could follow and almost immediately, was knocked in the head and down on the ground because he walked right behind other kids swinging. It was the last straw! He started to cry, I started to cry, and before I knew it, I was an absolute mess. I kindly informed the lady that I needed to go, was sorry for all the disruption, thanked her for her time, but I couldn't stay. As I walked to the front of the building carrying Brayden, we were both sobbing. I was embarrassed, HOT, stressed trying to listen and watch over him and I just could not take another second of it. Five minutes in the car on the way home and he was OUT...sound asleep! I walked in the door at 11:40, put him to bed, and came downstairs wishing I could have a big, fat glass of red wine. WHO DOES THAT at 11:40AM?? I don't know what came over me but I could not quit crying as I left that place. I am either way more anxious than I realize about having another baby in 3 1/2 weeks, or I put a ton of pressure on myself for my kids to "behave" in public, or a combination of the two. Brayden obviously was not being disobedient, he simply wanted to explore and play, but I could not relax because he was literally INTO EVERYTHING and it absolutely stressed me out. I've never been more glad to pull in the driveway and be home than this morning. What a DUMB DECISION!

WHERE have we been???

2011-05-12T08:44:00.000-04:00

Wow! I can't believe it's been almost a month and a half since I last blogged AND I can't believe we have just shy of 5 wks until Little Miss Neely makes her debut and our world is turned upsaide down again! We've been busy, to put it lightly. And the next 5 weeks will also be busy. So what have we been doing?

Here's a snapshot:
*took Brayden to a "kid salon" to have his shaggy-dog look snipped to a much shorter length (Kid friendly salon or not, it didn't go well!)

*we took a week long vacation in Hilton Head, one of our FAVORITE spots,

*celebrated a wonderful Easter and enjoyed watching Brayden get excited over each egg he found in his first Easter egg hunt,

*unfortunately missed the BIG HUNT at a local farm not far from us (we'll shoot for that one next year)

*entertained my parents and Memaw when they came through Atlanta on their way to and from Tennessee,
*thanked my dad for completing a "daddy-do" list during his short stay,
*made more progress on the nursery (which I'm sorry to say, is STILL not quite ready!),

*made minor house improvements, such as cleaning and carting off various loads to Goodwill, buying B a sandbox, planting new hostas in back bed, planting 18 leyland cypress along side yard as barrier, and giving B & N a kids bathroom (which also isn't quite yet complete)

*enjoyed a very special Mother's Day with my boys at the Zoo,

*ATTEMPTED to have family pics made with a very busy almost two year old (still hoping at least SOME of the pics will turn out nicely)
*and have enjoyed many mornings and afternoons either at the park or simply in the backyard!! As long as there are rocks to be found, a shovel to play with, a ball to kick, and chalk to mark everything, a boy has it all!!

We are trying to soak up the last few weeks with just the 3 of us and take advantage of the time by making memories. Brayden has been particularly "snuggly" if that's a word...he often wants to cuddle on the couch, lay against daddy's chest while he reads stories, and simply be near us. He is definately turning into such a little boy and full, so full, of personality! He crawls up on the couch to watch a show, or lays in the floor with his knees bent like a young man. He is now walking the stairs and is very deliberate in his pursuit of what he wants. He has thrown a few tantrums (as in literally throwing himself on the floor and then banging his head on the floor) and is learning that 1) it kind of hurts, and 2) it is NOT a productive way to manipulate us. He is quite the charmer though. On a few occasions, in the middle of being scolded, he has leaned in and graciously given many kisses as if to absolve or erase his wrongdoing. It's cute and sometimes hard not to "melt" but we are trying to be firm. We have delighted in hearing him speak more...he is learning to put words together and form small phrases/sentences. He has a huge vocabulary and is very choosy about when he uses it. This can be frustrating, primarily because I want him to speak more spontaneously, but I am trying to be patient. He is VERY STUBBORN!! Have I mentioned that? He would rather smack his hand on the table and do without than simply say, "please" when he wants something. I try not to get into a battle of the wills (because afterall, I too, can be quite stubborn), but I'm sure there have been times when I reduced myself to that. He has begun "singing" catchy tunes that he either hears on the tv or songs we sing with him and occasionally engages in a dialogue with himself (very cute!). For example, at mealtime he will look at his plate and ask himself if wants to eat such and such or if he wants to drink his milk/water and then proceeds to answer his own question. I personally think this process is adorable because he's thinking out loud. And with the considerable warmer weather, he LOVES to be outside!!! I bought a small plastic pool that we could use in the backyard to cool off and he thinks it is the perfect accompaniment to rocks and garden tools! I LOVE this stage (even if he can push me over the edge sometimes!) because he is learning and developing so much. I love to watch his wheels turn as he processes something new.

In other news, we are excitedly anticipating Neely's arrival very soon. The other day, in fact, I had 4 contractions...so intense that I couldn't walk and HAD to sit down in hopes that the pain would subside. It did... and I was a little nervous I may be dealing with pre-term labor. After a quick doctor's visit the next morning though, it proved to be false labor. Good news since I have a few more weeks to go AND we've already had quite the drama with Little Nee-Nee (as Brayden calls her). I don't think he really understands that a baby sister is soon to invade his self-centered world, but he does show signs that he knows something is different. I know though, no matter what the adjustment period looks like, he will be a proud, protective big brother! I am beginning to feel anxious about "bringing home baby" since my list of chores still exists and I am getting bigger, hotter, and "tireder" by the day. No, seriously, I am grateful for a good pregnancy...other than the usual first trimester nausea and third trimester lack of sleep, I have felt and feel great! In fact, I'm sad to stop my class at the gym because it gives me such a good workout, but I was told to "get off my feet" and "take it easy." If you want to know how to pray, Neely is still presenting breech and I would like her to turn, and I am hoping, with the help of fioricet, to nurse longer this time than last. Pray that the migraines will not be such an issue this time. Thanks. okay, I've written long enough...until next time...XOXO

a park kind of morning...

2011-04-04T15:24:00.004-04:00

There's a new park in town...Fowler Park in Cumming. It is AWESOME!!! I could not get over how nice all of the facilities are and all that is available. I think it opened in February, but we haven't been, primarily because of the cold. Today, however, it's been in the 80's (mid 60's this morning) with a constant breeze and a clear, blue sky! I think this will be our new regular spot. Brayden LOVES to swing and was energized by all the other kids there. I helped him up the climbing wall so he could go down the slide, walk across the bridge, and play with the chimes. He had such fun that on the way home, he fell sound asleep. So mommy took advantage and laid out in the sun for an hour! Have I mentioned his new obsession? Blues Clues. Oh my goodness....i had no idea what I was doing when I introduced him to a Blues Clues dvd. It's all about the alphabet (he LOVES letters!) and he is so obsessed that he carries the dvd case around with him everywhere....has even slept with it. And when he wakes up, he has Spot in one hand and Blues Clues in the other. Oh my! What have I started? Anyway, I'm sharing this because in the pics you'll see he's holding something. That "something" is the Blues Clues case that he cannot bear to part with, even for the park!

progress...sometimes backwards :)

2011-04-02T12:40:00.002-04:00

Chris has been gone ALL week (another story for another post). I always turn into "eager beaver" when he's away, because I usually have 8,000 projects in my head to accomplish and think how great it would be if he came home and I had done at least 4,000 of them! This time was no different. After battling my loneliness and grumpy mood over the dark skies and pouring down rain, I began to make progress. So far, I have cleaned out Neely's closet (and you know how these things have a domino effect), cleaned out and reorganized 3 other closets, made piles for Goodwill, trash, and storage, moved all furniture in Neely's room to center of room so I could tape and paint, taped the whole room, and successfully painted one wall--the darker wall. I have also fallen backwards off the chair while taping the ceiling (miraculously did not hit my head on the dresser directly behind me!), run into the door handle (also backwards), producing a substantial bruise, and managed to have other mysterious bruises on my body from bumping into walls and door facings for no apparent reason. Aghhh...am I turning into clutz or what?! Pregnancy is the only time you find yourself ultimately humiliated and embarrassed and no one else to blame but those darn relaxed joints and loss of balance.

Here's the one painted wall in Neely's nursery. It's called Italiano Rose. And yes, I do have to finish the trim...did not cut in enough.

the pregnant brain...

2011-03-30T18:28:00.004-04:00

Tonight we took a late trip back to Home Depot. I have been obsessing over paint colors and decor decisions for sweet Neely's nursery and this made the 3rd trip to HD in 2 days! We left the house at 5:30 and had 3 errands to run. I planned to run in HD, purchase sample cans of two colors of pink: one very pale, and the other, a brighter, cheerier pink, run in Target (what's a trip without swinging by Target), and lastly, I promised Brayden McDonald's for dinner (healthy I know!). As I am carrying Brayden through the automatic doors at HD I suddenly realize I never changed my shoes...I am wearing my house shoes!!!!! Ok, sure, high schoolers do this everyday and even worse, if allowed, wear pajama pants to class. BUT I'M NOT A HIGH SCHOOLER!!! and I cannot stand to see people in their "house garb" at the store. Surely I needed to visit Wal-Mart so I could feel that I fit in. O well...I did my errands in my house shoes with people occasionally staring at my feet. What do you do? Take a picture and laugh at yourself! I've had much worse embarrassing moments...all centered around pregnancy! :)

a p'cola wkend

2011-03-23T17:51:00.004-04:00

It's been forever since I've updated...I've vascilated between having nothing of significance to post and so much I want to post that I walk away, feeling the task is too great. Silly, I know. This past wkend Brayden and I took off for Pensacola to see my fam. Chris' mom, Barb, came along. She'd wanted to get down there to see my mom and I was grateful for both the company in the car and her help with Brayden as we trekked almost 7 hrs to the Gulf! Of course, if we hadn't made a 45 minute stop at Chickfila, our time would have improved drastically. o well. We had a GREAT time--- we went to an arts festival in Fairhope, AL on Saturday and then to breakfast at my favorite little place, Bagelheads on the Bay, on Sunday and then spent the rest of the morning at the beach! It was a fabulous weekend. Brayden had to adjust to the sand all over again. At first, he was definately not too fond of the tiny white granules that stuck to his skin, but he did get used to it. I kept thinking "at least he's not crying and pitching a fit," which is what my younger brother David did when he was two. For a mom who LOVES the beach and could stay literally ALL day, I think that would feel like a cruel joke! The water, however, was a different story. As it crept up from the crashing waves, he would back up so not to get his feet wet. In his defense, it did feel like an ice bath.
Upon return, Daddy gave B his first golf lesson and we began the process of FINALLY transitioning him to his BIG BOY bed!!! The bed has only been sitting in his room for 2 months! While we were away, Chris took the crib down and moved the changing table out, making room for his new bedroom furniture (hand-me-down from mom and dad). I really think he loves his new room. He was eager to get up on his bed and read books (that actually started awhile ago) and when it was time to go to bed, we said "okay, time for night-night" and he laid right down, snuggled beside his two favs: Spot and Blankie! So far, he has slept very soundly. I am soooo proud of him! Additionally, he has learned the whole alphabet! I am especially proud of that! Each night in the bath, we go over each of the letters (b/c we have those foam kind that stick to the sides of the tub) and he has learned every one! He also has a cute alphabet placemat from PB Kids that helps to reinforce what he learns in the bathtub. He is becoming such a little BOY...not a baby at all anymore. It makes me sad that his babyhood is over, but at the same time, I couldn't be prouder of him as he grows and develops into a sweet little tornado of a toddler. Thank you, dear Lord, for such a wonderful blessing in our lives!

a little tid-bit

2011-02-10T17:26:00.001-05:00

In researching the meaning of Neely, I have found that it means "victorious, champion, passionate." How cool is that?! Already, she has been such a fighter---a champion indeed!

our little MIRACLE...

2011-02-07T14:03:00.002-05:00

Dear "Team,"

I affectionately call you team because of your commitment to stand with us in prayer over Neely and the issues we have confronted until this point in pregnancy. I am so very pleased to tell you that we saw the perinatologist again this morning for the 4th ultrasound (I am 21 weeks) and there are NO TRACES of the cystic hygromas anymore!!!! If you remember, they were separate structures and there is no trace of their presence!! The extra fluid on the back of the neck is GONE and the measurements are now within normal range. Additionally, the heart, which was the primary focus of today's visit, is NORMAL---normal size, normal outflow and volume of blood, normal bpm...normal! All other anatomical structures presented themselves to be healthy and evidence of a miracle! We are overjoyed to see these prayers answered for Neely's life to be sustained and healthy growth and development to occur. Because of today's findings, we can rule out 80-90% of usual heart defects. There is a small chance of discovering a hole in the heart, but this cannot be seen on ultrasound and we are not expecting this to be the case post-delivery.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for standing with us and supporting us in prayer. We cannot say enough how grateful we are for both you and today's news. We have found ourselves in that 2-4% window of having a normal baby. Praise Jesus! Her little life is a miracle!

Love to all,
Amy and Chris

PS: when I get the chance, I will scan in some pictures of Neely...she is precious! and when we asked Brayden if he was ready to have a baby sister, of course he replied "Hmm...No." :) He's a stinker and we love him to pieces.

snow galore!

2011-01-15T10:04:00.000-05:00

(Note: I started this post several weeks ago; I am finally sitting down to finish it! I couldn't not record the 5-6" of snow!!)

I have needed to write for quite some time. When I find myself anxious I know I need to sit down, still my heart and let the words (thoughts) flow. It calms me; it helps me think and process; it's so necessary for my heart. You'd never know it now but I used to be an AVID journalist...and then there was a block. I didn't pick up a pen for YEARS!!! I still don't journal in the pen and paper sense, but this blog has helped serve somewhat as a personal journal---to celebrate, to mourn, to remember, to pray.

We were thrilled to wake up to snow early Monday morning. The forecasts had been calling for a snow storm to sweep through the South, beginning for Atlantans between 7 and 9 pm. But by 9:30 there was still no snow and I was bummed! You'd think I was a kid watching and waiting for Santa Clause. But about 10 pm, it began drifting down from above....a beautiful blanket of white quickly forming against the black backdrop of night.

The next 4 days were spent sledding, sliding, trying to build a snowman with snow that wouldn't pack because it had turned to ice, and admiring the sudden peace that had draped itself over our community. We ate dinner with neighbors each night, rotating houses, and enjoyed an extended period of family time. What a pleasant and unexpected gift!

Neely Jane Phillips---due June 21st, 2011

2011-01-14T08:17:00.008-05:00

Here is a copy of an email I sent out last week regarding Neely. (For those of you who've been following the blog and praying for us, I apologize for the delay in sending this update).
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"We are grateful for what God has done in just a matter of weeks (from our perspective). I have been praying that God would heal little Neely and that we would be recipients of a miracle baby; I have also prayed that God would graciously prepare our hearts for whatever story he is writing and that no matter the consequence, we would remain faithful and trust His ways.

We praise him for yesterday's good news! After meeting for an hour with the genetic counselor and discussing all of our options, based largely on what the ultrasound showed in the next hour, we were already exhausted. But PRAISE JESUS that when the moment of truth came, we not only saw and heard a strong heartbeat, but the cystic hygromas AND fluid on the back of the neck had reduced in size!! This was huge as I had been nervous all week about what we might see. Because of this, we decided not to pursue further testing and allow the cells to be discarded. Of course, if we get to 20 wks and something is off, we understand they will have to extract new cells, but we will cross that bridge when we get to it. We are trusting that at the 20 wk appt, the hygromas will be completely dissolved. Though we rejoiced when we heard the chromosomes were normal, we were told yesterday that was the biggest, most important "chunk" of information because usually cystic hygromas are associated with some form of trisomy and this proved not to be the case with us! Praise Jesus for his mercy and for sustaining health and life in Neely. The doctor is still a bit concerned, only because of the remaining presence of the hygromas and because he couldn't get a solid view of the heart, but we are trusting for the best!

In the meantime, I feel like I can finally be excited about this baby girl. I cannot say how thankful I am for all of you---for your commitment to intercede for us and for your friendship and love. Thank you for encouraging us with truth when our hearts were filled with anxiety. We have experienced the body of Christ like never before!
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A note about the name: Neely is a name we have liked and hung onto since we were first married. Tom and Diana Patton, the missions pastor and his wife at St. Paul's Prebyterian in Orlando, did our pre-marital counseling and had three children, Nathan, Noel and Neely. Neely was the youngest, was kind, courteous, and spunky in her own way. We wanted to honor them because of their influence and impact on our VERY young married lives. Jane is my maternal grandmother's name (spelled with a "y") and my mother's name is Janene, from "Jayne." On trips to Tennessee to visit family, I remember people calling both my mom and grandmother (Memaw) "janie." I wanted to honor both of these women by passing their names onto our daughter.

I return to the doctor (perinatalogist) in three weeks for another ultrasound. Our prayer is that the cystic hygromas would be completely gone and the heart, in particular, would be normal. Would you pray that with us?

In the meantime, here's our little monster contemplating his new big boy bed...he took a full 3 hour nap in it yesterday. When I heard he was awake, I slowly opened the door to find him safely on the floor, reading books!!

a spot of sun

2011-01-01T14:28:00.005-05:00

So much has happened since I last wrote! Chris, Brayden and I packed up and headed to Florida for Christmas 2010...and MISSED OUR FIRST EVER WHITE CHRISTMAS here in Atlanta! I couldn't believe the pictures of local snow, especially since Atlanta weathermen are known for forcasting snow flurries or wintry mix or even accumulation, and what happens? Nothing! We enjoyed our time in FL though, seeing family we hadn't seen in almost 3 years. It was doubly fun when B's cousins arrived; he and Aubs followed each other around for 2 days and sat only to play with toys, read books, or watch an Elmo video from Santa. It was, however, a certainly different kind of Christmas. I am usually enthusiastic about driving around to see various light displays and enjoying the color and lights of the tree, but this year, before we left for Florida and even a week before Christmas I commented that I was "sick of all the lights and decor." I was ready to strip it down. My heart has been all over--ready to have a simpler celebration and ponder the significance of the birth of Jesus, and at the same time somewhat disconnected and indifferent to all the "hubbub." We enjoyed watching Brayden smile and get excited over new toys, books, puzzles, but we just weren't "into it" this year.
Surprisingly though, on Christmas Eve, I received a phone call from the geneticist who I thought I wouldn't hear from until Monday after Christmas. She congratulated me that the CHROMOSOMES ARE NORMAL!!! and said my bloodwork revealed a 1/10,000 chance for the baby to have Downs, Trisomy 18 and Trisomy 13. I was honestly shocked. The doctor told us that the chances of us having a "normal" baby were between 2 and 4%. Of course, the reality is that we are still not quite out of the woods because we were also told that IF the CVS came back normal (which it did), it meant one of two things: the child was truly normal and healthy and the lymphatic system had been slow to develop (i.e. the cause of the cysts), OR the baby has an even rarer disease, not screened for with the CVS. After a 2nd lengthy conversation with the geneticist on the 27th, we have been advised to pursue further testing, in hopes of identifying what may be causing the additional fluid on both the neck and in the form of cysts at the base of the neck. Because abortion is not an option, we are not yet sure whether we will pursue these tests (2). The cells are due to be discarded on 1/8, so a decision is needed quickly. In the meantime we return to the doctor this Friday, 1/7, for another ultrasound and meeting with the genetic counselor. Depending on the result of that ultrasound, we will decide whether or not we will move forward with additional testing, as that is the last possible day to have it done. We have heard stories where all tests are normal, but the ultrasound has identified structural abnormalites or deformities. Because of this, the geneticist said they rely heavily on routine ultrasounds for information about the baby.
My prayer is that this Friday we would have a normal ultrasound, that all fluid would be gone and there would be no sign of additional cysts anywhere in the body. Please join me in praying the same. Until then, we are praising God for granting us a baby GIRL!!! and I frequently find my thoughts drifting toward pink and considerations of a new nursery. But I am also taking one day at a time and praying for a full-term, 100% healthy baby girl to bring home from the hospital.

the beginning

2010-12-21T13:20:00.004-05:00

Hopeful. Today I feel hopeful. It's inexplicable but I'm glad for the momentary relief of fear. Maybe it's denial, but I'm calling it hope. If you're wondering what on earth I'm hopeful about, let me start at the beginning.
I am 14 weeks pregnant. The last few months have been filled with nausea, headaches, extreme fatigue and questions. At 6 weeks I began hemorraging and should have lost this precious child, but he or she hung on! We were amazed and thrilled to see a flutter of a heartbeat on the ultrasound screen, shocking also the tech, nurses and doctor. The next 6 weeks were filled with questions...am I still pregnant? I don't feel sick today. What does that mean? What if there's no heartbeat when we see the doctor? Slowly though, the bleeding stopped and the 12 week check-up proved evidence of a strong, determined heartbeat coming in at 160 bpm. Thank you Jesus! We celebrated the life in me that continued to fight.
Last Friday, however, sent me spinning. After having light laughter and conversation with the ultrasound tech about our hopes that this child would be a girl, the tech left the room with a changed demeanor. I wondered if there was something wrong. The doctor came in and took a deep sigh and after looking for himself, told us that he was sorry to have to inform us, but there were some abnormalities with the baby. The measure of the back of the neck was too thick and two cystic hygromas were growing on either side of the base of the neck. I wanted to say "you've got to be wrong! Look again!" as I did a quick mental inventory of all my family's health. How could this happen? I'm healthy, active, not yet 35 (the marker for automatic "high-risk"), have zero health problems... but the screen told another story. The doctor went immediately into mumbling about seeing a genetic counselor and statistics related to chromosomal abnormalities and having a CVS done, but I was almost too far in the pregnancy for that, and again, he's so sorry! I must've sat with my mouth gaping open and asked him to repeat everything as I tried to understand that there was indeed a problem. We were then sent to another doctor who was willing to squeeze us in for 1 pm at Northside. Because my placenta had moved, they had to do a transabdominal entry for the CVS, removing sample tissue from the placenta to better identify the cause of the extra fluid and cysts on the neck of the baby. We were given a 2-4% chance that the child will be normal. The most common causes of cystic hygromas are Trisomy 18, 13, Turner's and Noonan's Syndrome, and infrequently Down Syndrome. Obviously the outcome does not look good. The results will not be in for 7-10 days and I am scheduled to return to the doctor in 3 weeks for monitoring. Our minds have been everywhere...we know the statistics for children diagnosed with Trisomy 18 and 13; we don't know a lot about Turner's or Noonan's--only that it is an absence of sex chromosome and the physical and/or mental defects can be significant. We don't know what road we're on....we don't know what God will ask of us and we're not promised healing, but we do know it CAN happen.
Last night Chris and I sobbed as we read a blog I had run into several times...Bring the Rain. I love the song and had actually incorporated those words into my prayers many times, asking God to draw my heart closer to His, to grant me the privilege of knowing Him in a deeper way. I have to wonder, is this His answer?? And in my flesh I think, "oh I didn't mean it like this!" I KNOW that we grow in valleys, but I hate the valley. The feeling of uncertainty, lack of control, emotional messiness and open possibilities scares me. I am planned, calculated, and orderly. This is out of order--MY order. It's very strange but in some ways I am not shocked that we are facing yet again, another trial---a trial so deep and dear and personal that there's no question that there is a part of our hearts he is asking us to surrender. From the very beginning of this pregnancy I've had a sober awareness that anything can happen. And while we prayed for a baby girl, I kept saying "I just want it to be healthy!" But I didn't really, REALLY think that we would be facing the possiblity of chromosomal abnormalities. In the meantime, I pray for this child's protection and safety. I pray for life. I pray for healing. I pray that we would be recipients of a miracle baby. And I thank God that he is drawing my heart closer...needy and dependent on his strength alone.

"Bring The Rain"

I can count a million times
People asking me how I
Can praise You with all that I've gone through
The question just amazes me
Can circumstances possibly
Change who I forever am in You
Maybe since my life was changed
Long before these rainy days
It's never really ever crossed my mind
To turn my back on you, oh Lord
My only shelter from the storm
But instead I draw closer through these times
So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of
The dark clouds that may loom above
Because You are much greater than my pain
You who made a way for me
By suffering Your destiny
So tell me what's a little rain
So I pray

Holy, holy, holy
Is the Lord God Almighty

no words

2010-12-20T19:28:00.004-05:00

I sit down to write and stare at a blank screen and my eyes fill with tears. I don't know what to say. I'm not real sure how I feel. Chris and I talk about it but to have to write, to face my fears or my already hurting heart makes me hesitant. I don't know what i feel. Friday I was shocked, scared and surprised. Saturday I felt numb. Yesterday I felt like it was a bad dream and maybe I would wake up and the dream would stop. Today? Today I don't know...sad, scared, worried, confused, like I've taken a deep breath and I'm waiting to exhale. In some way it's all too familiar and that frightens me. We've watched two sets of close friends lose their babies. If this is a girl, it pains me to think there's something wrong with my baby girl...this sweet child for whom we've prayed. The waiting is the hardest! Somehow I think if I could just hear my blood results, I'd know something and feel better. That's not true...I'd want to know more... and I'd want to know what the outcome is. How's it gonna end? Just tell me now so I can deal with it! But it doesn't work that way... and as a good friend reminded me, no one REALLY knows. We won't know the end until it happens and what will the end be? Aghh....
I watched a portion of Sarah Palin's Alaska the other night and her son Trig was on and I thought "is this it, Lord? Is this what you want me to get ready for?" Right now the possibilities are endless...could by Down Syndrome, could be Trisomy 18 or 13, could be something even more rare. We just DON'T KNOW! and that not knowing is maddening! But in the meantime I am asking for peace. Only His peace can bring the comfort we need. And somehow I do believe he is giving it...there's a small sense that whatever happens, he will carry us. That is what I have to dwell on for today.

Has it really been a year and a half???

2010-12-01T13:55:00.002-05:00

Happy 18 months sweet Brayden! I have said before and I'm sure I will say a million more times, but we could never have imagined how drastically our lives would change when we came home with you from the hospital. When I look back, I remember what an anxious mess I was....for what felt like months on end. At the same time, our hearts were instantly filled with love. We could not be more grateful for you and your fun, vivacious personality. You are full of life and approach new tasks as a challenge to be mastered. You are such a little smiler and flirt and are eager to "talk" to strangers. You also know just what you want and are quick to tell mommy "no" when she gives you water and you want juice! You also know the limits, telling yourself "no" when you touch ornaments on the tree that mommy has asked you not to touch. You have 17 teeth!!! and we are all wondering when this teething frenzy will finally cease. Because you like to suck the toothpaste off your toothbrush, you are eager to "brush" your teeth every night before bed. You are a routine junky and this makes mommy very proud (because she is obsessed with routine too!) going to bed each night between 6:30 and 7, but you are flexible enough to sleep wherever we put you down...as long as there's a pack-n-play. On that note, you are almost too long for the infamous pack-n-play. At 18 months, you weigh a little more than 26 lbs and are 33 1/4 inches long!!! You eat like a champ and hands-down, your absolute favorite meal is spaghetti. Last night you downed 4 meatballs with your noodles. You like to play drums while mommy's cooking (a wooden spoon and 2 Christmas cookie tins) and if she's not careful you will unroll the whole roll of aluminum foil because you can reach the counters. You've never had ANY interest in signing, but you are eager-beaver to talk and so far can say no, nose, mama, bye, car, ball, bat, and answer "moo" for the cow and "woof-woof" for the dog. Surprisingly you get excited when Abby-Cadaby comes on Sesame Street, you love Dinosaur Train, and you're still obsessed with SuperWhy. When mommy or daddy sing the T-Rex song, you giggle and squirm and show all your beautiful teeth! We love that! You take one nap and sleep 3-3 1/2 hours. This is when mommy thinks about all the things she can do while you're asleep, but then falls asleep on the couch herself--ha! You are determined, sometimes obstinate, curious, and tender. You have a sweet little heart and we have already seen traces of its sensitivities. When daddy gets home from work, you look forward to wrestling, playing hide-and-seek, throwing the ball, or charging him and burying yourself in his belly. Like a playful cub, you are a content little boy. We love you!! Happy 18 months!

with thankful hearts...

2010-11-24T12:37:00.005-05:00

we celebrate this Thanksgiving. In the midst of our stress and what feels like an unending trial, we are ever grateful for all the blessings and gifts God has given-- our families, our friends, clothes and shelter, hot running water, enough $ to pay the bills and buy groceries, our health, our cars, and sweet Brayden.
Four nights ago we experienced the scare of our lives as parents. After leaving a Thanksgiving party early, we came home to find Brayden had a 102.5 fever. Sure, it happens, but he has never had a fever that high! As instructed by the on-call nurse, we continued with Tylenol every 4 hours and dressed him in light clothing for bed. It wasn't enough. At 3:30am I went in to check on him after hearing some coughing and wimpering. As soon as I entered the room he went into a seizure! Panicked I yelled to Chris to come quick, something was terribly wrong. He immediately dialed 911 and the police, paramedics and firemen were there within minutes. I was trying to comfort him, holding him and telling him "mommy is here...it's okay..." but his eyes continued to roll back in his head and his poor body was shaking violently. Brayden was having a febrile seizure, a seizure caused by a sudden spike in temperature and we were instructed to lay him on the floor and turn him on his side in case he needed to vomit. All I could say was "please God, please don't take my child!" As we watched his poor body shake, we were petrified. Finally the seizure stopped and he began screaming, a terrifying scream that made me think he was scared. His body was boiling hot so we layed a luke-warm towel over him and began wiping down his body to help draw the temperature down. Our hearts were breaking... Soon after, we found ourselves headed to the hospital--me in the ambulance with Brayden and Chris right behind us in the car. Tests at the hospital confirmed it was in fact a febrile seizure and there would not be any permanent damage. Luckily, I already had an appt with the doctor for Monday morning due to his continual congestive cough. While the fever came down on Sunday, it was still hovering around 101 when he went to bed that night. I put him in a t shirt and diaper, as told, but set my alarm to check on him every 3 hours. Monday morning's doctor appt revealed that Brayden had "acute sinusitis, acute pharyngitis, and strep." Poor baby! So we headed home, picking up another round of amoxicilin filled at the pharmacy and praying for a swift recovery.

We are grateful he is still here...grateful for doctors and anti-biotics, grateful for his sibling's life that continues to make me nauseas, and grateful for a family who helped so much in preparing the big meal that this Thanksgiving was relaxed and stress-free. What are you thankful for?

Reason to trust

2010-11-19T09:50:00.003-05:00

I have grown up believing and memorizing Scripture verses like "all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to his purpose" or "trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your steps"; "the mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps." The reality is that even though I believe this to be true and I believe the Lord to be sovereign over all, when trials strike, it is all the more difficult to put faith to action and cling to these promises. But that is how faith is strengthened and growth occurs. We are in the valley. We are asking fervently for God to "show up", to provide for our needs, to sustain life inside me, and to give us the grace to continually lean on him and trust that he "owns the cattle on a thousand hills" and can overwhelm us with blessing as he so chooses.
We made the decision at the end of last school year for me to stay home with Brayden, to concentrate on raising and nurturing him, celebrating his little life. It has been a HUGE adjustment from working full-time and having a tangible sense of purpose and accomplishment. But I am grateful for the opportunity to watch him grow, change, develop and to begin the teaching and training process of his mind and heart. We could have never guessed that God, in his sovereign plan, would choose to allow Chris' job to take a nosedive, but it has! Each month we struggle to see how we will meet the bills, knowing that eventually the money will run out. Christmas is not even on our radar. I have begun to tutor a bit to supplement what little I can. We believe God has a plan in this and that He will provide for His people, but oh how we need to see that provision in tangible ways! The cool thing in all of this is that we have seen our true, desperate need for Jesus. It is so easy to live independently of Him when all financial needs are met or even exceeded. I usually go somewhat nuts at Christmas because I love to give gifts and enjoy the ability to give and the possibility to brighten someone's day. This year, it has all become so simple: I want to enjoy the Christmas season with dear friends and family and reflect on the significance of Jesus' birth...something that has been long lost in my own heart for the past few years. How quickly His coming to earth and being born of a virgin to very humble means has become just a story.
In the midst of this we discovered that I was pregnant! It was what we wanted and somewhat planned for, but we had no idea that we would enter into a significant trial at the same time! At six weeks I began hemmoraging and just knew we had lost the baby. To everyone's disbelief, there was miraculously a heartbeat when I went in for an emergency ultrasound. We were ordered to return for another ultrasound the following week and grateful to hear that the heartbeat was even stronger than before and the baby was growing. I have been diagnosed with subchorionic bleeding, a condition that occurs in approximately 1% of known pregnancies. The week we returned to the dr. office, the blood mass measured 2x as big as the week prior. There is nothing that can be done and 75%-90% of these kind of pregnancies go to full-term and have healthy babies. The risk is that if bleeding continues, it could pull the placenta away from the uterus, causing a miscarriage. The hope though is that the blood would clot and the uterus would grow, thereby putting pressure on the open blood vessel to stop the bleeding. The past few weeks have been filled with questioning as I have continued to bleed and experience all-day nausea. While nausea is typically not preferred, it is somewhat of a comfort that I am still pregnant. When the nausea is not present, I'm instantly filled with fear that life has ceased; but when there's a significant amount of bleeding, I'm also concerned that something is wrong. As an old friend taught me, I have to dwell on what I know to be true. Until I know otherwise, I must choose to believe that there is still life growing inside of me and that whatever happens, God certainly has a plan and will give us the grace to accept his plan. Whew! That's alot!
So, we continue to trust....to believe that He is in control and is working "all things together for good." Does it feel good? no, but He promises to provide for his people so we choose to lean on these promises to give us hope. O how this world is not what it seems; there is constant struggle and hardship, but He promises to be enough.

I'll leave you with one of my very favorite pictures of sweet Brayden. Spaghetti is absolutely one of his favorite meals and I love to watch him dive in!

Happy Halloween

2010-11-19T09:32:00.004-05:00

Trick or Treat...sort of! Since it's almost Thanksgiving, I thought I better go ahead and update the blog before I get too behind!! This was Brayden's first year to actually dress up and play trick or treat. Since he was only 4 months old last year, we simply dressed him in a pumpkin sleeper and took pics with him. This year, however, I was so excited to dress him in his lion costume. Informally, we refer to him as our little lion cub so when I saw this costume, it was perfect! If you've seen him lately you know that he has a "mane" of his own, as his hair has grown rather long. (I just cannot bear to cut the curls!) He happily donned the lion suit, but when it came time for the headpiece, he was not so thrilled. Of course, our plan was to only visit a few houses so we had to move quick before he went into destruction mode! And, while he IS walking, he so frequently continues to drop back to his knees (he and cousin Aubs are the only "knee-walkers" I have ever known!) that we decided to cart him in his handy-dandy car. He does weigh about 27 lbs, so carrying gets old after 30 seconds! It's hard to believe this time next year, we'll have another one to tote around. Yep, we're pregnant! More on that subject in a later post. We also took pics that morning after church with B in his "happy halloween" romper my mom made him. I must say, he was definately the cutest kid in the nursery :). oh, and p.s.: I have successfully trained my child to love pumpkins. He gets so excited every time he sees a pumpkin and for whatever reason calls it "bah." Actually, just about everything is "bah" these days :).

go big orange! our trip to burt's farm

2010-10-23T13:24:00.006-04:00

from itty-bitty to well over 80 lbs, we were lost in a sea of orange. with gorgeous weather, we thoroughly enjoyed this fall morning and the start of a new family tradition!

mommy's little "helper"

2010-10-22T13:35:00.006-04:00

b has been sick with a sinus infection...now the second one in 2 weeks! the downside of this, other than he's so pitiful when he's sick, is that he is EXTREMELY clingy (which is not like him at all), and that we are home most of the time, instead of getting together with other friends to play. the upside is that because he is so clingy, we do have some sweet moments of mommy-son bonding that he has grown much too independent for when he feels his best! that said, he has been my little helper around the house. he helps unload the dishwasher even when it's still dirty, he helps with laundry and even changes the cycle if mommy's not watching, and he helps grocery shop by almost falling out of the cart to tell me he wants goldfish! he loves to open and close drawers, so he is very helpful to give me aluminum foil or wax paper even if i don't need it and occasionally he "mops" the floor by pulling the towel off the oven handle and pushing it across the floor. when the fridge is open he kindly pulls items out of the door and if the pantry door is left open, he "organizes" the shelves. o but what a sweet boy! i am grateful to be home with him and watch him change and develop so quickly! i wouldn't have it any other way.

(please note the "boo" ghost in the picture. this was his craft from school, made with his footprint! how cute! what a great gift to the mommies!)

Honk-honk, beep-beep

2010-10-22T13:23:00.003-04:00

Ready for the road! A few weeks ago grandma and grandpa surprised Brayden with a car! We have several friends who either have one just like his or something similar and B just loves to climb in, press the horn and pretend to drive. The benefit of this one is that it's a perfect "next step" from the stroller. Instead of strapping him in the stroller to walk around the block, we now strap him in his car and he is happy as a clam! After all, he does love to "drive" the cart at Publix! He is so obsessed with his new car, that when we come downstairs in the morning, he climbs in immediately, stands up and tries to make the car "go." He is such a little monkey that he also enjoys climbing on backwards and leaning on the handle---to do things the "wrong" way is much more fun!

a grateful heart

2010-10-09T20:26:00.008-04:00

if you read my blog, it's probably no surprise to you that chris and many members of his family on his mom's side have hcm. we knew the day was coming when his aunt jean would need a heart transplant, but we never really expected the day would come this soon. and...we never expected a match could or would be found as quickly as it was! yesterday, a match was identified for aunt jean! HOPE was renewed in the form of modern medicine. she had a chance to start over, a chance to have a new heart. the surgery was long and intense, but all of the doctors and nurses have agreed that she has done so well. already, her blood pressure is better than it has been in years! aunt jean, we are so proud of you! and we are grateful to God for guiding the hands of the doctors, allowing the transplant team to be proactive enough to forsee this need, and sustaining life in you. i am once again reminded that life is fragile. we are not in charge of our tomorrows and that is such a difficult concept to grasp as i continue to make plans and look to the future, but the reality is that God could take my life at any moment. wow! hard stuff!
aunt jean, we continue to pray that you will continue to respond well to your new heart and experience many happy years with renewed energy and strength! we love you!

Pumpkins Galore

2010-10-09T15:11:00.005-04:00

i LOVE pumpkins!! and i love pumpkin bread, pumpkin cheesecake, pumpkin muffins, pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin coffee creamer...you name it! if it's pumpkin, i am sure to enjoy it :). well, when it came to decorate for fall, b noticed the pumpkins and scarecrows right away. he likes to touch the pumpkins, study them, admire them. i bought him a cheap little pumpkin pail with jack-o-lantern smile on it from target the other day and he has not stopped playing with it! he puts small toys in it and then takes them out...and it only cost $1!!
today we visited the pumpkin patch at a local church. my ideal is to go to one of the farms here in n ga where there are hayrides, a bonfire, miles of corn mazes, nad produce to purchase from the farm, but since chris and brayden both have been sick, i opted for the local church. pumpkins were spread all over the hillside! there were bumpy, ugly pumpkins, green, smooth pumpkins, small, large, medium, tiny, yellow, orange, all kinds of pumpkins!! b was fascinated and i loved seeing him climb over the pumpkins and happy to touch as many as in reach. he did not like, however, sitting on the hay bale with the scarecrows to have his picture made. ??? who knows about that one, other than he has become awfully clingy to me and until he realized there were pumpkins next to him that he could touch, he seemed bothered. you may see that in some of the pics. other than that, we had a great time. can you believe how long his hair is getting?! i love it!!
ps: he has taken a few steps this week!!! first 2 on tuesday and 2 again on thursday. i can't wait to see him take off!

Sometimes...when it rains, it pours!

2010-10-07T14:42:00.000-04:00

it's been a week! now, i know that compared to what others are enduring, my small troubles are NOTHING, so i can hardly complain, but it doesn't change the fact that sometimes when it rains...it pours! b's nose had been running and his voice had been a bit hoarse from friday to saturday. i figured it was a cold. by sunday, his eyes were swollen, almost shut, were leaking yellow/green mucus, and he had a slight fever. i was worried. i couldn't wait for monday to roll around so i could call promptly at 8:30 for a dr. appt. that night, i was awake with him from 2-4:30am because he could barely breathe and i couldn't bare to look at him, he was so pitiful with those eyes! then, we woke early monday am to one of our smoke alarms going off downstairs--the battery was dying and it was chirping that annoying "chirp" every 6 seconds. so c left for the infamous walmart at 6:30 for a round of 9V batteries to silence the birds. we learned at the dr. that b had an awful sinus infection. unfortunately the medicine and milk didn't like each other and he vomited the rest of the day! between changing his clothes, cleaning the floor, wiping his nose, cleaning his eyes, and administering medicine, i was exhausted!! finally, at 4 that afternoon i sat down to turn on oprah, hoping he would play with some toys on his own (the tv had been on pbs most of the day---a RARE occurrence!), but instead he turned to me, shook his head and said "no, no, no." by tuesday chris was feeling sick... there were 2 patients in our house the rest of the week!

Summer Recap

2010-09-20T16:17:00.003-04:00

Summer came and left and in two weeks, it will be OCTOBER!! Already this morning, I passed a man setting up his pumpkin patch! I do love fall, but I am feeling a bit behind in trying to keep up with all that has happened lately and I only have ONE child. So, for posterity sake, and before too much time passes, I feel the need to highlight some of Brayden's big moments this summer. I realize, dear reader, that you may not find all my musings interesting, but I will appreciate my notes in years to come, which just so happens to be the primary purpose of this blog/journal/photo album/whateveritis. :) So here goes: In late June, Brayden's Great Aunt Jean came to visit for a whole week!

Even though we have no pictures of the two playing in the pool, she did swim with him and take him for a few "motorboat rides"---"motorboat, motorboat, go so slow..." And a month later, Uncle Phil came down and surprised B with his very first set of golf clubs!!! YAY!!

Daddy can't wait to teach him to play golf! (or baseball or football or any other sport for that matter). On that note, two of B's favorite words right now are "baw", translation= ball and "bah", translation= bat. In July, we took our week vacation to Hilton Head (which I've already blogged about) and a week later we turned around and boarded an airplane to Pensacola for a week to visit my family and attend "sissy's" shower for baby #3!!

Even though we were only in Tallahassee for less than 24 hrs, it is always great to see my sis and spend time with her fam and see the kids. Bray also enjoys playing with the girls! (B asking cousin Aubs for some of her goldfish :)--if you're eating, he thinks he should be too!)

We were such proud parents as Brayden did exceptionally well on both Marta and the duration of our flight. Once the plane took off and he ingested about 27 goldfish and 3 oz of apple juice, he fell sound asleep on my shoulder! :)

Really, the only downside was that mommy and daddy were like packmules, loaded down with not only luggage, but a carseat, stroller, and a pack-n-play! I felt like I was traveling across Europe again, trying to board a fast moving train with a stupid duffle bag that had broken wheels! Oh well--we made it! In those instances, we remember very quickly that Brayden weighs A LOT! That week, we all enjoyed time with Abuela y Papi, MeMaw, and Grandma, and Brayden especially enjoyed playing with Lucky, mom and dad's cocker spaniel.
After the shower in Tallahassee, we brought cousin Ellie back with us so she and Brayden could play and keep each other occupied. Chris and I even got to go out on a date! So, we went to one of my old favorite's, Peg Leg Pete's on the beach for their fried shrimp platter! Thanks mom and dad, for a great week.

Where did the time go?!

2010-09-13T15:12:00.004-04:00

When I was in college (I can't believe the "years ago" are now in the double digits!) people used to tell me "you have more time now than you will for the rest of your life." That annoyed me. I couldn't imagine being any busier, but I knew conceptually that surely life would get busier if I someday married and had a family. It did. And they were right! Already, we are practically half-way through the month of September. Fall is in the air, summer has packed its 90 degree temperatures away until next year, and Brayden began his first day of "school" today! WHAT??!! Where did the time go?! It's not REAL school, it's called Playschool, Moms Morning Out, but Mr. Independent had no time for kisses from mom. Nope. He spotted new toys, new boys and girls with whom to play, and wanted out of my arms immediately! He greeted his teacher, refused her offering of a snack, and off to play he went!

On one hand, I am so proud of him--he is independent, socially adjusted, friendly, and confident. On the other hand, I am terribly sad that he wanted nothing to do with me as I waved good-bye. In fact, when I returned at the appropriate time to pick him up, upon seeing me, he CRIED!!! Cried--red faced and all. What is that?! He was busy putting blocks into the kitchen sink and evidently I spoiled all the fun. Five minutes in the car, he was sound asleep.

3rd time's a charm

2010-08-21T10:51:00.004-04:00

I cannot believe school is starting and I'm not there! Today is the first day of school for Fulton County; Forsyth (where we live) has been in session for three weeks! This is about the third time I've tried to sit down to write this post, so I'm hoping I won't be interrupted and can actually think logically. You know what they say: third time's a charm!
I wondered ALL summer what it would feel like when it came time for school to start and I wasn't a part of it, a part of the dept, the buzz of the beginning-of-school activities, feeling "out of the loop" pertaining to all things educational, and didn't have the stress of getting my classroom together, dropping Brayden off at childcare everyday and missing him, planning for five classes, grading at night, and scratching my head at 4pm most days questioning what on earth I could make for dinner. Two things: I do feel "out of the loop," but it also feels great to be home and not have all the extra responsibilities. Trust me: Brayden keeps me plenty busy!
Brayden and I dropped by the school last week during pre-planning to visit some of my teacher buddies and deliver some cookies. Incidentally, it was also information day for seniors, juniors and sophomores, so I saw a bunch of old students and was able to hug their necks and say hello. Of course, they all went crazy over the cutest boy in the world and one girl, commenting on how long and pretty Brayden's hair is, said: "He's almost got the Justin Beiber sweep going on." I told her that was exactly the look we were going for!
So today, on the first day of school, it does feel somewhat surreal: I woke up around 7 (nice change from 5:30) and I am sitting in my pjs as I type, while Mr. B watches "Dinosaur Train" on PBS. Today we'll do laundry, go to Publix, maybe hit the park, and play around the house. When he naps, I'll read--something I've not been able to do for pleasure in a LONG time! Everything has been for school, which isn't always bad, but a leisure book IS nice every now and then. Speaking of...The Help is my newest recommendation. Written by Kathryn Stockett, an Atlanta native, the book explores the unique relationships between black and white women, serving as employer/employee during the 1960's, and the racial tension that these women felt, sometimes caring and sometimes not caring at all--in fact, far from it!
To all my girlfriends starting the year, Have a great day and a great year!! I'm thinking of you...

An honest post...

2010-07-21T19:23:00.003-04:00

I must confess that I really don't know what I think about this blogging thing. There are days that pass when ideas flit in and out of my mind and I think "I should write about that," but then more days go by and when I actually sit down to write, it all seems so awkward. A million questions flood my mind---why am I writing this, do people really care, am I bragging about my child/my life, am I capturing the moments I really want to capture, in ten years will all of this matter, what about the things I want to say that have nothing to do with Brayden? Do I always have to write about Brayden? It is sort of awkward to sit down and post any and all thoughts to a blank computer screen, not knowing if there will be any feedback in return. The truth is that though I like to write, I personally have not written in so long, that I feel frozen when I stare at an empty post box asking for a story. So here's my disclaimer: most of the posts from here on out may be about our sweetheart Brayden, but a sprinkling may be about the rest of our life---thoughts on God, parenting, friendship, marriage, family and anything else that happens to creep in. With that...

Today I missed my grandfather. I had to buy stamps and went to the post office in town. It was around lunch time and there were several elderly gentlemen in line; one in particular held the door for me as I walked in and allowed me to enter the line ahead of him. He said he was "only there for stamps." We chatted a bit while in line and as I left I saw his wife in the car. He'd left it running to keep her cool in the A/C no doubt. Tears welled up in my eyes as I drove away. I thought of my grandfather. I could see him driving his car. I could see him reach over to grab my grandmother's hand and I could hear him say "Come on mother...let's go get ourselves a sandwich." I could hear his voice plain as day and I could see his smile. He loved my grandmother and he loved me. He loved all of us. And then I thought about how cold he was lying there in the casket...how still, lifeless and how shocked we were that we were having a funeral. I miss my grandaddy. I know he's with Jesus and someday I will see him again, but for today, I miss him. Grandaddy, I love you! I'm sad you're not able to watch Brayden grow, but you'd be so proud. He is turning into such a strong and handsome young man. Ellie and Aubrey are precious as ever and Julie is having a boy, Ethan, right around your birthday! We all love and miss you, but you are in a better place. We will see you again and we are grateful you are healed and free from this broken world.

DAVID LEE DYSTER
1923 - 2009

David Lee Dyster, age 86, of Pensacola, passed away on Monday, October 5, 2009 with his family by his side at West Florida Hospital.
Mr. Dyster (David) was born September 6, 1923 in Olathe, Kansas. Mr. Dyster served in the US Navy during WWII and US Coast Guard following WWII. David worked in Civil Service for the Army and Air Force his entire career, retiring at Eglin AFB, Fort Walton Beach, FL in 1984.
David married Myrtle I. Weston on December 3, 1947 in Irma's home town of Grand Bay, AL. David and his family lived in Grand Bay, AL before relocating to Fort Walton Beach, FL in 1968. Following retirement David and Irma moved to Jacksonville, FL to be near their grandchildren. In 1996 David and Irma relocated back to the Florida Panhandle, settling in Pensacola.
David was always active in his church serving in numerous positions including a Deacon at Union Baptist Church, Grand Bay, AL, First Baptist Church in Ft. Walton and First Baptist Church in Jacksonville, FL. He was a member of Olive Baptist Church in Pensacola, FL.
David was also an active volunteer at Memorial Hospital in Jacksonville, where he served as the first man to be President of the Volunteers Auxiliary. He volunteered in Pensacola at Sacred Heart Hospital for ten years and volunteered for the library at Olive Baptist Church.
David is survived by his loving wife of 61 years, Irma; a son, David M. Dyster (Janene); a daughter, Ruth Dyster-Moore (Al); six grandchildren, Julia Wolfe (Brian), Amy Phillips (Christopher), David, Jonathon Dyster, Sarah and Matthew Moore; and three great-grandchildren.
Visitation will be held from 5:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m., Thursday, October 8, 2009 at Faith Chapel Funeral Home South.
Funeral Service will be held at 10:00 a.m., Friday, October 9, 2009 at the funeral home with Dr. Ted Traylor and the Reverend Eugene Steele officiating. Interment will follow at Barrancas National Cemetery, NAS Pensacola, FL.
FAITH CHAPEL FUNERAL HOME SOUTH, 100 Beverly Parkway, is in charge of arrangements.
In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to The Ministry Village at Olive. Inc., 1836 East Olive Road, Pensacola, FL 32514.
You may express your condolences online at fcfhs.com

Published in Pensacola News Journal on October 8, 2009

the rest of our vacation...

2010-07-21T17:16:00.006-04:00

Yay Brayden!!! Celebrations and Fun Facts

2010-07-20T17:12:00.012-04:00

Favorite food: Applesauce, hands down!
Favorite word: Momma
Favorite new skill: standing and clapping
Favorite tv show: Elmo's World/Super Why!
Favorite video: Praise Baby
Favorite activity: Reading books--I am REALLY good at turning the pages, one at a time, and reading out loud to anyone who will listen!
Favorite game with Daddy: throwing the ball/playing "catch"--I'm pretty coordinated for a 13 month old!
Favorite game with Mommy: throwing the tupperware, smiling when she tells me "no", being anywhere she is :)
Favorite new place to go: the beach!!!
Favorite challenge: retrieving items, esp. balls, out from under the furniture
While away on our trip, I began standing (Yay Brayden!!!) and clapping (Yay Brayden!!!). Mommy has tried and tried to teach me to clap but I haven't really been interested until now. On our trip though, one night after dinner, after I had eaten ALL of my ravioli, Mommy and Daddy were clapping their hands as they said "Yay Brayden" (like they ALWAYS do), and something clicked! I wanted to clap with them, so I did! Mommy now thinks it's cute or something. Just this morning, while at playgroup, one of my friends went pee-pee in the potty and when all the mommies clapped to say "Yay," I also joined the celebration, clapping my hands. I turned around to smile at Mommy to make sure she saw me!

I'm also pretty good at standing now. I shocked Mom and Dad in Hilton Head one night. They were getting a few things out of my room and all of a sudden I popped up on my feet and they couldn't believe it. I felt like saying "What? I've been doing this for awhile guys. Where've you been?" It's so much fun...Instead of sleeping this afternoon for my nap, I just practiced standing and falling down, standing and falling down, standing and falling down and then I'd clap for myself! Finally after an hour and a half, Momma broke up the party, but she took a few pictures first. Here's what I looked like...
I know I must be cute too! I can tell she's trying not to laugh when she comes in and finds me having fun without her. I think she gets upset when I don't nap because then I tend to wake up in the middle of the night and I'm ready to play at oddball hours, like 4am, and she has to come in and tell me to go back to sleep. She always looks so grumpy at 4 o'clock in the morning! I know she's proud of me though because sometimes she ends up laughing or smiling at me and she always kisses my forehead and says she loves me. I've been eating better too! I know this is turning into a brag blog, but I used to think I was driving my mom crazy with my eating habits. I went from eating nearly everything to eating only Cheerios and applesauce. I LOVE my milk too, but that's never been a problem. Anyway, when we went to the new doctor he told mom to quit worrying about me and I would eat again when I was ready. Well--I'm ready! This morning for breakfast I ate a cereal bar and Cheerios, for lunch I had 2 pieces of turkey, 1/2 mozzarella string cheese stick, applesauce and goldfish, and for dinner I had chicken pot pie! And of course, all three meals I clapped for myself when I finished:). I've also been drinking through a straw now for well over a month and think this is great accomplishment--so much easier than trying to drink through a sippy cup. Mommy's pretty proud too! She says it makes life so simple; she can take juice boxes to the pool. :) Well, that's all for now. It's time to go to bed. Wish me luck! (or my momma...)

Harbortown, Sea Shack, and Bike Rides

2010-07-14T07:06:00.008-04:00

Walking around Harbortown

The heat index in HH today was 105, with an actual temperature of 95. Because thunderstorms were predicted for the afternoon, we decided to go to Harbortown in the morning to see the lighthouse, walk around South Beach Marina, and eat some lunch at The Salty Dog. Wrong! The waits (Salty Dog and their two overflow restuarants) were all at least an hour. So, we headed to a local fav--as featured on Rachel Ray's $40 a day, The Sea Shack. Nothing fancy--patrons are served on paper plates with plastic utencils--but VERY good and well-priced. Their specialty is the "Shack Attack"--shrimp, oysters, scallops, tilapia, and crabcake, either blackened or fried, with 2 sides. YUM! Brayden helped himself to some applesauce and hush puppy and spit out a bite of cheese grits that I just knew he would love!
(Hunter, Chris' cousin, waiting on his buffalo gator po'boy!)

The evening brought additional showers, but we were able to squeeze in our first family bike ride...check out how cute Mr. B is with his helmet on. Even though I knew he needed this, I was really worried about strapping such a contraption on his head for fear that it would ruin the whole experience, but he did GREAT! Funny story about the helmet though-- we had to go buy it at Wal-Mart and I kept looking for an infant size label; no such thing! The smallest they carry is for a 3 year old with a head circumference of 50-52cm. Thanks to Brayden's "big" head, his 48cm is not far off! So the helmet is a tad bit large, but there's room to grow! :)

Brayden putting on a show after a full tummy--proud of himself for eating all of his "din-din." Of course, Mommy was proud too!

Beach Baby, Beach Baby there on sand...

2010-07-12T20:00:00.010-04:00

What a cutie!

Just happy to be here...

Brayden has made Momma proud! He is a definite beach bum. Though we introduced B to the sand and water in early April at Pensacola Beach, the day was windy and somewhat chilly. He didn't protest but he didn't relish in the experience either. This week, we are on vacation in Hilton Head, one of our very favorite places, and he has proved himself to withstand hours of sun and able to digest handfulls of sand! He is also such an extrovert that just like a friendly dog, he has taken off a few times to visit others on the beach, requiring us to go running after him. It is at this point that we are thankful he is not walking yet :). So far, we are having a great time---a much different trip from last year, when we thought it would be a good idea to "escape" and come to the beach when he was a mere 3 WEEKS OLD!!! WHAT WERE WE THINKING?? Oh, the difference a year makes. First day--after a long walk in the stroller earlier that morning and waking at 4:30 due to FOUR molars coming in at SAME TIME, sweet B fell sound asleep on our stroll down to the beach.
from stroller to towel--sound asleep! I even managed to get him lathered in sunscreen :).
testing out the sand on the first day---hmmm...not so sure at first and then within seconds he began digging and dumping it all on the quilt! :)

"Saturday (Sunday actually) in the park, I think it was the Fourth of July"

2010-07-07T17:12:00.015-04:00

Late last Friday afternoon Brayden and I were sitting down reading a book when there was a knock at the door. "Hey Amy. How's it going? Listen, I don't know what you and Chris have planned for the weekend, but...are you gonna be around? We have some tickets to the Braves' 5 o'clock game on July 4th that we can't use. They were a gift from a client and I think they're pretty good seats." We really had no formal plans for the weekend. We'd wanted to hear Tim Tebow speak at a neighboring church, but had nursery duty at our own church and couldn't find coverage. We did plan to grill out with Chris' parents late on Sunday afternoon after church and go see some fireworks, but Grandma and Grandpa are ALWAYS up for watching Brayden if the opportunity arises. Plus, Chris and I have been desperate for a date and the timing just hasn't been right...either that or we haven't made it enough of a priority. Anyway, we decided YES! Of course we want the tix! So after church, we had standard American fare with Gma and Gpa Phillips and then off to Turner Field for a July 4th with our favorite Bravos. Not only did we have unbelievable seats, our parking was paid for in a lot directly across from the field (usually when we do this kind of thing we pay $10-12 to walk several blocks). Our seats were located in the Golden Moon Casino, which is the old Lexus location, and couldn't have been better. Right along the first base line, we were shaded and had access to air conditioning and an upper tier of restaurants and restrooms only available to those seated in the GMC. Nice! We'll probably never sit there again since the face value of the tickets were $50 each, but what a nice gift!! Unfortunately, the Braves did lose that particular game to the Marlins, but they won the series.

After the game there was a concert by the Yacht Rock Revue, a band touted as one of the hottest new party bands in Atlanta and the best band in the universe for light 70's rock! Literally, they looked like a remake of the Village People and straight off the racks from Goodwill. I kept waiting for them to sing YMCA but they never did. They were, however, incredibly talented and very much enjoyable singing the tunes of Elton John, Billy Joel, Phil Collins, Olivia Newton John, Chicago and others. It was a blast and I honestly think Chris was amazed I knew so many "old" songs. I reminded him it was because he chose to marry an older woman :)! Thanks Dad for listening to such great "oldies" in the car and christening my ears to good music! Seriously, you should check them out. They also performed that morning in Piedmont Park after the Peachtree Road Race, which I'm sorry to say I did not run this year, so they must've made a killing in one day!

And of course, we closed the evening with fireworks! The Braves always put on a good show (they do fireworks after every friday night home game), but for July 4th it was especially spectacular. Thanks Tom and Lorraine for an incredible evening and a great date night! and thanks Mom and Dad Phillips for babysitting Mr. B!!

No Need

2010-07-07T15:36:00.005-04:00

LOVED the new pediatrician! LOVED him! Everyone said I would and I did! There is a reason he has almost a 2 month waiting list to see him---because HE'S AWESOME! (Can you tell I was pleased?) Brayden, who has never met a stranger, warmed to him immediately, grabbing his nose, playing with his "flashlight", and babbling away while I tried to explain our background information. Without taking you through the whole appointment, step-by-step, the bottom line is that Brayden is normal and at this time, he does NOT see a reason to pursue physical therapy, and certainly does NOT see the need for a neurological exam. YAY!!! He asked several good questions, the first of which was "Do big heads run in the family?" This has been mentioned to the doctor before, but I've never quite felt validated in my information offering. He then did a basic physical exam, checking for muscle tone, particularly in his lower body. "My gosh! This kid's got rocks in here, Mom!" was his comment when he checked his thighs. I smiled. "Oh, I know. That's from kicking in his bed before he falls asleep." He was impressed with how sociable and personable Brayden was for his age and said that typically when there is gross motor delay, there are warning signs in other areas, such as social skills, fine motor skills, etc.. This coupled with his excellent muscle tone helped rule out the need to pursue specialized care. He basically said that Brayden will walk when he wants to and we can do things to encourage him to use his feet, but he will do it when he's ready! I can't tell you how I appreciate his common sense approach. He has practiced for 21 years, has 6 children of his own and was warm, gentle, laid back, and clearly loves kids! I am thanking God for not only a positive report, but a great new doctor!

New Ped and Super Why!

2010-07-07T08:11:00.004-04:00

We love the GPB channel! Brayden is currently watching Super Why while he plays with his singing mailbox and mails letters to himself :). This is actually a very quick post because we are off to the new doctor this morning for a second evaluation about Mr. B's gross motor progess. Naturally, I am anxious to hear a fresh opinion. I'll post the update once we return, as well as give a quick update on our July 4th surprise! Happy Wednesday!

One of the sweetest sights in the world---my two boys huddled up reading together!

Healthy and Strong

2010-06-26T07:11:00.007-04:00

Yesterday I took Brayden to a Pediatric Opthamologist for a more specified eye exam. We have noticed, occasionally, that one eye tends to be "lazy" and turn out or is simply delayed in focusing with the other eye. This concerns us because Chris' mom had a lazy eye and had corrective surgery for it as a child. They say the sooner you spot these kinds of things in children, the better the chances of correcting the problem. But, Brayden checked out just fine! The doctor, who I liked very well, said he has two very healthy and strong eyes, and that if the tendency exists, it is well-controlled and may only happen on occassions when he is extremely tired. In the meantime, we will "keep an eye on it!" :)

Update on standing: So I know I'm no physical therapist, but I've made it a point everyday to encourage Brayden to stand and strengthen the muscles and tendons surrounding his ankles and feet. We practice by putting blocks and other toys on the coffee table for him to play with while I hold him at the waist in a standing position. This seems to work well, as he can stand for a good 5-7 minutes. We also practice standing on the kitchen floor with me simply holding his hands while he stands and I usually sing a song I made up about standing! This really helps too and yesterday he even wanted to take a few steps! He is no where near doing it on his own, but I'm okay with that. He's learning.

One other cute thing: Brayden is fascinated with wheels, turning cups upside down, and books! His Aunt Julie and Uncle Brian and cousins Ellie and Aubs gave him a BIG Tonka dump truck for his birthday. He loves to fill it up with books, dump them out, turn the truck on its side and spin the wheels! He will forego all the musical toys now (well, most of them) in preference for surrounding himself with a pile of books and flipping through those instead. It is the cutest thing! I even turned around the other day at a stop light to check on him (because I hadn't heard any chatter in a while) and he had fallen asleep with a book wide open in his lap---too CUTE!

The latest and greatest...

2010-06-24T08:29:00.010-04:00

Is he a little Chris or what??!!

We are having a fantastic summer! Well, I am bored sometimes, but that's my own issue because I don't really know how to fully settle down and relax without feeling a little guilty. I am not bored in that I don't have enough to do though. With the exception of Brayden waking between 5:30 and 6 am, chattering away and ready to eat, Brayden and I ARE having a great time together! He is full-swing into toddlerhood--throwing food, shaking his head "no", pushing his milk away, smiling at me when I tell him "NO!" as if to say "aren't I cute?", and INTO everything. His new favorite trick is to maintain eye contact with me while he, oh so slyly, slides a bite of food off the back of his tray, as if I can't see what he's doing. He then looks over the side to see if his projectile has landed. He is definately more interested in playing with his food than eating it.
Brayden and Luke playing together
The kiddos watching Sesame Street--our new fav!

I am grateful to have a standing appointment each Tuesday with my girlfriends from school and their kids for playgroup. Kari, Denah, Michelle and I rotate houses for playgroup. It is honestly the highlight of my week! Whoever hosts provides snacks for the kiddos and muffins or cinnamon bread and coffee for the adults :). A great time is always had by all. Lately, we've been hanging out on Thursdays too, rotating each other's neighborhood pools, which is doubly good: it wears the kids out and we get sun! I am also trying to get back into running---it's been more than a year now since I've run regularly, which is not only awful, but I'm embarrassed to admit. I went with my friend Becky for the first time last Thursday and was pleased: we went 4 miles! I think I went to bed at 8 that night :).

In early July we are seeing a new pediatrician. When we went for Brayden's 12 month wellcheck we learned that our current physician is STILL concerned about gross motor delay, citing two reasons for the now alarm: not pulling up to stand, not walking. We were referred to a neurologist and physical therapist for review and treatment. I have since scheduled a second opinion appt with another doctor (someone highly recommended and difficult to see) and asked for records to be transferred. I will surely undergo p.t. if necessary, but I would prefer the opinion come from someone who's been practicing longer and is obviously well-respected in the community. In the meantime, I feel like I question every other day whether there is delay or not. Personally, I'm not concerned that he's not walking yet, but I feel like I'm supposed to be concerned. It's perplexing and I just want to know that he's fine.

Happy Birthday to YOU, Sweet Baby Boy!!!

2010-06-22T16:33:00.004-04:00

We cannot believe our baby boy is a toddler!!! We celebrated Brayden's 1st birthday on Saturday, June 5 with family and close friends. I was especially delighted that my family traveled to be here from Florida (minus both brothers) and could share in the fun. The cake episode was of course, enjoyable, but we concluded that Brayden does not prefer to have sticky things on his hands. Instead of diving into the cake and pursuing a sugar high, he was a bit distracted by trying to shake the icing off of his hands. All of this led to much frustration and an eventual wiping of the face and ears, which is how they, in turn, became bright red with icing! It was a great day. Thanks to all who came to celebrate with us!

All Clear!

2010-03-17T20:14:00.006-04:00

It's kind of crazy that I haven't written in 2 1/2 months and in the past 2 days, I have written 3 times. Oh well. Brayden did great! He did scream and cry and of course, this broke my heart, but my fear was that he would squirm and be so restless and agitated that it would require sedation and we would have to cancel the appointment and reschedule. This did not happen. He was clearly annoyed by the head vice/mechanism that restricted movement, but for the most part, he was simply scared! Chris had to take over because all I wanted to do was comfort him. The technician ran the scan twice and once the machine began to move, Brayden calmed down--such an answer to prayer. I think he was mesmerized by the sound and movement of the machine. When it was over, we were released to leave, which was the "all clear" that nothing life-threatening was identified and we could go home. On the drive, however, the technician called Chris to tell him 'off the record' that the radiologist found NO SIGN OF FLUID on the brain, and furthermore, his brain measurements were "well within the normal limits for a child his age." Praise Jesus! We are so grateful! So, just as we suspected, Brayden has a big head, and there is NO WAY he is experiencing gross motor delay; he simply hasn't started to pull up on furniture yet. He will! Thanks for your prayers and well wishes! Love to all!

Under the Pile

2010-03-17T12:28:00.004-04:00

I have wanted to update our blog for what feels like a year! Even though it's only been a few months, so much has happened. We have had an extremely cold winter and Brayden was privileged to see snow not once, but four times!!! Our biggest snowfall occured when I was out of school for the day--a planned teacher holiday if you can believe it--and we knew the weather forecast called for the infamous word: accumulation. But, it happened just as the weatherman said it would; it began snowing Friday afternoon and acculmulated up to 5" and by the morning, we had a beautiful blanket of soft, white snow covering as far as the eye could see. I was so happy to bundle Brayden and take as many pictures as possible. He's not quite old enough to make snow angels, but we did sit him in his bumbo for a snap or two.

The running conversations at school concern Fulton Cty's inability to maintain a budget and its need to eliminate close to 500 teachers for the FY11 school year. This is a tough pill to swallow for many, as all decisions are based on seniority with the county, and while some teachers may have 5, 10, 15 years under their belt, if they've only been with Fulton for the past 2-3, their job may be in jeopardy! I did turn in my letter of intent in January stating that I "intended not to return," but that statement is not binding should we feel I need some type of compensation. I've recently learned, however, that my name will most likely appear on the RIF (Reduction In Force) or surplus list, ultimately forcing me out of a job. God has a funny way about making things VERY CLEAR when stubborn minds like mine cannot seem to "get the picture." Some optimists say that if I were "RIF'd", as we call it, I could collect unemployment for essentially being fired and not finding a job in education because there are no jobs! That would be wild! The bottom line is that we are trusting God to provide for ALL of our needs "according to His riches in Christ Jesus." We feel confident that the best decision is for me to stay home next year to be with Brayden and I am thrilled at the very thought of this becoming a reality. At present, I literally have 150 research papers to wade through, 60 timed writings, 90short essays from a test, and other little things that I honestly just want to throw in the trash can! I am slowly making my way, but when I consider that the classroom size will increase next year by three students (from 32-35), I am so grateful the Lord has made a way for me to be home with my little buddy! He is such a delight to be with and his laughter can do nothing but create sheer joy in a room.
I'll post this evening an update from the CT scan. Thanks, in the meantime, for your prayers!

Don't Mess with Mama

2010-03-16T21:23:00.002-04:00

Last Friday I took Brayden for his 9 month well-check. It was the long-awaited moment--the new head measurement. At Bray's 6 month appt, the dr. informed Chris that she was concerned about Brayden's larger head circumference and the rate that it seemed to be increasing, BUT that she felt safe to wait until the 9 month mark to do any further investigating. As any mother would, I quickly phoned the doctor and in the meantime, did what I knew not to do: googled "larger head circumference in infants" on the internet. Bad decision.
On Friday I was told that his head has continued to grow at an increasingly alarming rate and because it registers >95% on the growth chart, it warrants special attention. I was also told the she suspects Brayden is already experiencing gross motor delay, as a result of an enlarged cranium. I left the doctor's office feeling frustrated, confused, anxious, defensive, and protective of "my little cub."
Brayden is a big boy! He weighs 23 lbs., measures almost 30" long, and happens to have a large head. Is that okay? Chris has said multiple times that big heads run in his family. When I answered that Brayden was not yet pulling up on furniture all the way to his feet, or holding onto furniture to bend down for a toy, or crawling yet, this was suddenly labeled as "gross motor delay." Brayden is, however, spinning around on his tummy, using his hands and feet to pivot, he is scooting (mostly backwards), he is pulling up on his bumper pad, and stands only when Chris or me hold him at his waist. In my heart of hearts, I really feel that Brayden is fine, but he is scheduled to have a CT scan tomorrow afternoon at 4:30 to assess whether there is fluid, or any other abnormality, on his smart brain.
Recently, God has made it clear to me that I still struggle to believe in His ultimate goodness, to believe that I can trust Him 100%, to believe that what is important to me also matters to Him, and so this small (or rather large) piece of surrender with Brayden is totally by design. I must trust that someone greater than myself is in control and is caring for Brayden while he is in the CT machine, while the technicians are snapping the necessary images of his brain and while the radiologist reads them. I must trust that all this will be done thoroughly and accurately and trust the results to God. He has promised never to give us more than what we can handle, so if this ends up badly, I know He will give me the strength to handle it. Please pray. Thank you.

Atlanta Snow

2010-01-08T13:43:00.001-05:00

(picture was taken yest afternoon; today the patio is white)

I woke up this morning to the outside covered in a light blanket of snow! It began snowing yesterday afternoon. I smiled as I walked to my car, with snowflakes falling on my head, because I couldn't wait to show Brayden the snow, and secretly I was counting on school being cancelled today. It is. By 9am the temperature was 16 with a wind chill of 2 and I simply sat huddled on the couch, still in my pj's, and enjoyed my cup o' joe, while I watched the fire flicker and Brayden bang on his new Baby Einstein piano he'd received for Christmas. I love slow, cold, coffee-filled mornings! We are snow-covered...if I can say that. In reality, it is only about 1/2 inch, but it is white, frozen, lovely, and going nowhere soon since the temps are not forecasted to rise about freezing until Sunday at the earliest. YAY!!! Needless to say, this brief interruption has helped ease the transition back into school for the Spring semester.
I've intended to write for quite sometime, but there is always some other task calling my name and when free moments are so seldom, the delight of updating the blog quickly becomes a chore. I also intended to have my Christmas cards in the mail by the 20th. That didn't happen. In fact, they weren't even mailed until 2 days ago! I think 2009 has been the year of....dare I say "CHANGE?!" Wonderful, fantastic, inviting, and lively change, but nonetheless, change. Chris and I have learned to work together better as a team as we've learned to care for and adapt to Brayden's needs and scheduling. We've also learned a whole new layer of selfishness exists within ourselves that can still be masked even in marriage. Having a child strips this away--hopefully! And I've learned that if I don't take proper care of myself, I will end up resenting everyone or everything around me. With that, the latter part of '09 has been extremely tough on me. Returning to work full-time has been more than difficult in trying to juggle the demands of work and home. I found by October I was depressed. I simply felt unhappy with my life and guilty that I was losing time with Brayden and he was growing SO FAST! I was angry that on the weekends, when I wanted to spend every moment with Brayden and Chris, I had piles of essays staring at me, waiting to be graded, and it seemed I just couldn't catch a break. God has been so gracious to provide incredible childcare for Brayden and I know that I needed to work for this school year, but we are trusting the Lord to provide for our needs so that I can stay home next year. If you pray, I invite you to pray alongside us that God would blow us away with his provision in this regard. I am hopeful to make several changes for my life in the year 2010. Prayer is one of them. I would like to pray more often and be more specific in my requests, believing God at his word. We are thankful to you for your friendship and interest in our lives as you follow this blog. May it, in some small way, be a blessing to you.

Merry Christmas from Florida

2010-01-08T13:34:00.002-05:00

Since I last wrote...

2010-01-08T12:57:00.006-05:00

we've had a half-birthday party for Brayden, in celebration of his 6 month birthday,
Chris and I have celebrated our 5 year anniversary,
Brayden is almost sitting up on his own AND he got a new carseat!
Oh yes--at a mere 7 months he weighs 21 lbs, so before we made the drive to FL for Christmas we decided to buy his convertible seat so he could be a bit more comfortable. Here he is, sleepy, but happy he can "spread out." :) He slept almost the whole trip. Nice.

Dear Santa...

2009-12-05T20:16:00.005-05:00

Today Grandma P and I headed out in the freezing cold, with bundled Brayden to meet Santa Claus and get a free 8x10 from Picture People. Check out this cute little bundle of love. I had to break into his Christmas stash so his head and hands would be adequately covered.

You'll notice in the pics that B's not really smiling...he sort of looked at Santa like "who are you?" and I couldn't help but think that based on some of the stories my mom has told of me when I was little, that maybe he was acting like his mom--studying those around him. Anyway, he sat with Santa and we exchanged "Merry Christmas" greetings and off we went! Poor Brayden was very cold as his little eyes were beginning to tear from the wind.

Our 1st family Christmas pics and more...

2009-12-04T21:25:00.003-05:00

No Bananas for Brayden!

2009-12-04T21:13:00.002-05:00

So...our little anxious eater has decided he absolutely detests bananas. I have tried them fresh and jarred and they are "no go." The first time was hillarious; he spit them out, followed by a gagging motion, complete with sound and tongue sticking out of his mouth and nostrils flared. It reminded me of my little brother Jon, who would "gag" when he had to eat his green beans. (Sorry, Jon). I waited a week or so and tried them again--jarred--"Chiquita Bananas." They were smooth, smelled sweet and were sure to tempt his little taste buds. Nope. One small spoonful came right back out onto his bib and then he clamped his mouth shut. He looked at me as if to say "there is no way you are feeding me that nasty stuff again." I laughed and shook my head and prepared apples instead.

Feeding frenzy update

2009-11-17T20:28:00.003-05:00

I told you how B is Mr. Efficient at eating--gobbling down his bites, now loving rice cereal, green beans, anything you put in front of him. Well, what began as arm control for Mommy has turned into food control for Brayden. Let me explain: I mentioned in a previous post that he gets anxious and begins to flail his arms if you are feeding him and do not have the next spoonful ready when he's ready. To remedy this I began holding his hands with my pinky fingers--one hand is holding the bowl with the food and the other hand maneuvers back and forth feeding him. At first, he did not like this tactic AT ALL; I'm sure it felt a bit like "lockdown" to him. Now, however, he has figured out how to use it to his own advantage. This is what he does: He squeezes both of my fingers, not wanting to let go for any reason. Why? One hand holds the food and the other brings the food to his mouth. He is so smart that he has begun to grab my hand and direct the spoon into his mouth and even fuss slighty as I move the spoon away from his mouth, back to the bowl to retrieve another spoonful of food. What a crazy guy!

Brayden's Special Day...

2009-11-17T19:52:00.005-05:00

Brayden was baptized on Sunday, November 15, 2009. Chris and I had anticipated this date for a month, looking forward to sharing it with family and friends. Sadly, no one from my family was able to make the occasion, but Chris' family was present. We were grateful his mom was able to video it. (Hopefully I will post this for you to share in the joy!) The day served as one of those "mommy moments" for me. I was so proud of my boy! First, he looked absolutely darling in his baptism gown, and I did make a point to tell the pastor that it was a BOY gown! Second, he was so good on stage (he's always good) and just so darn cute! He was startled by the cold water when the pastor put it on his head and began "gurgling" during his prayer. It was really cute. Our pastor also asked Chris to pray for Brayden. When he told me he was going to do this (just prior to the service), I thought, "oh great! so I better take a kleenex with me." Tears have flown easily since having Brayden and I already wasn't exactly the most stoic person. I don't think I was prepared though for how meaningful this occasion would truly be. It served as the moment when we, officially as parents, would give Brayden back to God, essentially saying "he's yours; we recognize that you have given him to us as a gift and it is a HUGE responsibility to raise him and care for him. We also promise not to stand in the way of whatever your will is for his life." WOW! How hard is that! I thought about some of the heartache I have caused my parents as I've made mistakes over the years, and they've had to trust that all the while Jesus was walking me through some rough waters to bring me to "greener pastures." Anyway, needless to say, I was thrilled Barbara captured everything on film. Chris' prayer for his son was beautiful. How grateful I am to have a husband who loves Jesus, loves me and loves Brayden.

Green beans, independence, & 'entertainment tonight'

2009-11-08T08:23:00.014-05:00

Brayden's personality has certainly begun to shine! We love to listen to him entertain himself in his crib early in the mornings on Saturday and Sunday before we go in to get him. From the sounds of it, he is having a blast! He is squealing and laughing and gurgling and making all sorts of high-pitched obscure sounds that keep him entertained for at least 15 minutes. We love this! He is now sleeping 12 hours a night, which is also nice, since it gives Chris and I some semblance of an evening. Of course, I am in the habit of falling asleep by 8:30 lately so we don't really have THAT much of an evening. Brayden has also decided he wants to hold his own bottle now which makes me proud of his development and at the same time, sad that he acts so independent of me! He has so mastered this skill that he has figured out how to pop the bottle out of his mouth and pop it back in, AND he has learned how to move it to the side to catch his breath, only to start drinking again when he's ready. Is he smart or what? I gave him green beans for the first time friday night and as I braced myself for the "ooh, this is awful" face, he opened his mouth wider than he did for sweet potatoes! He gobbled them down as if to say "where's the rest?" Feeding him is somewhat stressful...he has become so efficient at eating that if I don't have another spoonful of food ready to go, one right after the other, he gets antcy, flails his arms, and begins to fuss. From what I've heard, he is just like his father was!

Mr. Roly Poly...

2009-10-26T19:57:00.005-04:00

...in more ways than one :). Today Chris and I were both home to see Brayden flip from his back to his tummy (to love on Bunny) and then back again, from his tummy to his back! We have been waiting for this moment and have marveled at how high he pulls his legs, but only to turn to his side. And when we've had tummy time, he merely looks like a turtle trying to swim and gets frustrated that he can't get over, but today, while I was putting together his new jumperoo, he suddenly flipped both ways! Here are some pics of Brayden in his jumperoo. He is most concentrated as he studies each colored piece and determines how this new fun station works.

Special Day with Grandpa!

2009-10-23T10:45:00.002-04:00

I don't have pictures...YET, but Brayden is spending the day today with Grandpa P. "Miss Pat," our wonderful childcare provider, found out on Thursday she had to leave town unexpectedly, leaving me in a quandry as to what to do with precious Brayden for Friday and Monday. Chris has graciously already taken 3 days "off" to keep Brayden home for various reasons and to help me since my schedule is less flexible than his. This time, though, I knew I couldn't ask again. Besides, Chris had appts that couldn't be rescheduled at the last minute. So...I decided to ask Grandpa if he was up to the challenge. And he was!! He said even if B cried the whole time, he would love to watch him. I carefully wrote down everything I thought he needed to know and we laughed when he called last night to ask "will I need to change his diaper?" Currently, I am at school, but I just called to check on things and it sounds like Brayden and Grandpa are having a great time, and even the diaper changes are going well. Thanks, Grandpa P!! What a special memory for you both.

Trip to Uncle Shuck's...46 degrees and raining :)

2009-10-20T21:52:00.000-04:00

Food, glorious food! Baby food, that is...

2009-10-20T21:51:00.000-04:00

Brayden's intro to rice cereal, a.k.a. "gimme the bottle back!"

2009-10-20T21:50:00.003-04:00

many mini posts!

2009-10-20T17:52:00.004-04:00

We've been busy!!! And Brayden has kept us laughing. I wish I could communicate all the ways he steals our hearts with his smiles, his now laughter and giggles, his funny faces, and predictable cries, but alas! I cannot. Pictures do a much better job and at the end of a long work day, I have no energy to write the way I'd like to. So, here is a snapshot of what we've been up to: an introduction to rice cereal, my attempt (successful I think) to make baby food--(this is butternut squash and sweet potatoes), Brayden's funny faces in the Bumbo, our cold, wet, muddy trip to Uncle Shuck's Pumpkin Patch, and anything else that I thought you may find interesting. I have completely dropped the ball on having his 3 months pictures made, so we are shooting for 4month shots---in his baptism gown. You will be glad to know that he has outgrown nearly everything I recently purchased for him at a nearby church's consignment sale. Oh yes! He is 4 months old, weighs 17 lbs, 27 inches long and wears size 9 months clothing! His toes curl up at the end of his sleepers, requiring me to purchase new ones and I joke with him that his eating habits are that of his father, esp. when we were first married, such that I could not afford to feed him :). Brayden is indeed a big boy and we love him dearly. He has developed tickle spots all over it seems and we love to watch him giggle when we find them at just the right moment. What a fun little guy.

Rain, Rain, Go Away

2009-09-22T10:01:00.005-04:00

Chris and I joke that everytime it rains, you must leave work early because the traffic will inevitably be 10x worse, people freak out, wrecks occur, and you still get home 2 hours later than planned. Literally, for the past 7 or 8 days, it has rained here in ATL. The storms have been so bad that we've been under flash flood warnings for a couple of days, but yesterday (Monday) was by far the worst! As I sat in my classroom, I could hear the shatter of thunder and downpour of rain and wondered how I would get sweet Brayden into the car--envisioning trying to open the door, while holding both the carseat and umbrella with the other hand. Thankfully, Chris volunteered to pick him up, as he foresaw the need to...leave work early! Oh yes---over 100 roads were closed due to flooding in Cobb county alone, which is where he works, and yes, by the time he got home with B, he'd been on road for a little over 2 hours! In the meantime, schools had lost power, other counties had been released early for the day, and alternate traffic routes were being suggested over the radio airwaves. The state of Georgia has been in a drought for the past 3 or 4 years. Lake Lanier, which was still down by 9 feet in March of this year, has risen 3 feet in the past 5 days!!! While we are thankful for the rain, 7 deaths have been confirmed, as creeks and rivers have risen to record highs. Pray for those families who are suffering the loss of a loved one. Here is a video of a woman who died driving home from work. A valley in her road became a river and her van was swept away. She never made it home.

Go Noles!

2009-09-20T10:56:00.002-04:00

After being out of town for two weekends in a row, it was nice to stay put for a Saturday. Here's B watching Sportscenter with Daddy. Later, he was decked in his garnet and gold, ready for the big game. Though he was in bed shortly after kick-off, he was cheering on the 'noles in his sleep as they stomped BYU!!

Four Wives' Club

2009-09-20T10:41:00.006-04:00

[L to R: Amy & Brayden (3 1/2 mo), Denah & Luke (5 mo), Michelle & Parker Jane (16 mo), & Kari (due Oct 15) & Drew (2 1/2 yrs)]

Since moving to ATL, I have long desired for a group of friends with whom to hang out, connect, spend time, and simply enjoy life. Over the past year or so, this has happened naturally with a few of my teacher friends. It has been such a surprise and blessing! We are all in the same season of life, as we all have small children, and all teach high school English. Over the summer, we functioned somewhat of a support group for one another as two of us became first-time moms and another was 6 months pregnant. We enjoyed meeting bi-weekly at Chick-Fil-A for "mommy" time to connect and have adult conversation while we fed the bambinos. Last weekend, we had a chance to go to one of the friend's lake house on Lake Chatuge in NC. We had a great time soaking in the sun while the guys watched football and took care of the kiddos. Brayden had his first boat ride, which sent him straight to sleep! I did not complain. With literatlly 7 days of rain to follow, it officially marked the end of summer. What a great weekend with friends and sunshine! Love you girls and am grateful for each of you!

Beach, Brayden & the Bulldogs

2009-09-20T07:51:00.008-04:00

Every year my family takes a trip to the beach over Labor Day weekend. This year was a new and different experience for us since we have a baby, but we still had a great time seeing and visiting with family nonetheless. Instead of getting in the middle of the chaos of Seaside and Watercolor, we rented a house just next door, at Grayton Beach. It could not have been a better place. There was a long boardwalk that took us literally from the edge of the neighborhood to the white, sandy shores, and in the house, we had plenty of space to spread out and enjoy one another's company. Brayden watched his first Georgia football game with dad, complete in Dawg attire (complements of Grandpa Phillips) and I had plenty of sun time :). B did begin teething om the trip, which kept things interesting, but I did have Tylenol on hand (thanks to my sister Julie's excellent coaching!). While there we celebrated both Julie and my grandfather's birthdays. We always enjoy time with Julie and Brian and are amazed each time we see the girls, Ellie and Aubrey, and how much they've grown. We were grateful David could join us from Colorado and Jon's girlfriend, Jaime, was able to stay the entire weekend as well. We love Jaime and are excited to continue getting to know her. We are hoping to see David again over Christmas. Since he's been in Denver, out times together are few and we miss him and the way he always makes us laugh! Here are some family pics we took...why we opted for the morning, I'm not sure, but I'm confident we'll return to the sunset hour next time. Our squints are lovely!!

Happy 3 months, Brayden!!

2009-09-01T13:18:00.004-04:00

Brayden is 3 months old today. Wild. We wanted to celebrate his life by sharing some photos with you. He is busy smiling, laughing, babbling, blowing spit bubbles, curling his tongue, and holding tight to any object he can get his hands on. He can hold his head high and steady and enjoys looking around any room and is still best friends with the ceiling fan. When lying flat on his back, he likes to pick his legs up and pull them close to his chest and roll to his side. Does this mean he is soon to begin rolling over? He continues to delight us with his joyful sounds. Happy 3 months Brayden. We love you!!

12 weeks old and growing...

2009-08-27T11:03:00.004-04:00

It is hard to believe that little Brayden is almost 3 months old! It is also hard to believe that we are closing out our 3rd full week of school. WOW! Time has flown by. What a joy it is to watch him grow and develop. Just last night I took the newborn insert out of his carseat and adjusted the head pad and shoulder straps. We kept thinking he was outgrowing his seat, but I wanted to check the weight requirement before making any adjustments. Sure enough, when I looked in the user guide for his carseat, there was a caution sign (!) on the information page that read "newborn insert for children between 4 and 11 pounds." Brayden now weighs 13 lbs 10 oz!!! (I know this because he has his first cold and I had to take him to the doctor last Saturday!!) Yes, it was time to remove the insert. When Chris placed him in his seat this morning, he seemed much happier as he had more room to wiggle and squirm.
He is still eating five oz. every four hours, with his last feeding at 9:30pm, and waking at 4am for a diaper change. The past several nights though I have refused to get up because I have been so awfully tired, and he has been waking at odd times, ready to play. Between sucking his fingers and my prayers, he has settled himself and gone back to sleep. The nights I have chosen to check on him are hillarious: he is bright-eyed, babbling, and kicking his legs like it's time to get up at 2, 3 and 4 in the morning. I told him he was "terribly cute, but PLEASE go back to sleep!" :)
My favorite thing lately is that when we get home around 4:30 in the afternoon, we take a nap together from 5-6. It is the sweetest time we share and I feel like we reconnect after being apart all day. Motherhood has changed me in so many ways...I can't imagine my life without sweet Brayden. We celebrate his growth and development and yet at the same time, it's somewhat sad that he is growing so quickly. The adjustment to being a new mommy and having a newborn was such a major transition for me that I kept waiting for it to be easier and now that it is easier, I almost miss how small he was. I am grateful to Jesus for His all-sufficient grace during that time of transition for providing me with friends and family to love me and coach me through the hard moments when I was filled with nothing but sleeplessness, questions and anxiety. Brayden is now smiling most of the time and even laughing on occasion. He loves to babble and suck his fingers/thumb, and he is reaching/grabbing for objects. The other day Chris was changing his diaper and with a smile, pulled Chris' glasses off of his face. We love you Brayden and thank Jesus for the joy and delight you bring to our lives!! You are helping me learn to "not sweat the small stuff."

Back to School

2009-08-15T15:03:00.000-04:00

What a couple of weeks! Two Saturday nights ago I was already feeling anxious about the week ahead. We were planning to attend church on Sunday morning for the first time since Brayden was born and on Monday, Brayden was having his two month appt, complete with 3 rounds of immunizations. Tuesday I would return to work for a few days of pre-planning and would be dropping him off at the babysitter's for the first time! I've commented on my anxiety before. The whole idea of beginning something new stresses me out, BUT...Monday's appointment (two weeks ago) came and went and Brayden did fine. He ran a little fever in the afternoon, but I knew to expect that. At 9 weeks, he weighed 12 lbs, 14 oz and was 23 in long. He's put on an extra roll since then, so I'm sure the numbers have gone up! :) Tuesday's trip to the babysitter's was fine, though I did forget my "don't wear any mascara" plan and wore it anyway. It was fun to see my teacher friends at school, but I could not wait for 3:30 to hit so I could exit the building to pick him up.
The first week of real school has not been so easy. Literally after the first day I was exhuasted! I'd forgotten how much energy it takes to run a classroom and be "on" all day. I am grateful to have really good classes so far, but have missed Brayden increasingly with each passing day. By Thursday, I was crying as I dropped him off and had to simply turn around and leave, not saying my usual good-bye, I love you and have a good day. I also came down with a sinus infection, leaving me with a fever and in bed on antibiotics by Thursday afternoon. Welcome Back! So goes the life of a working mom I guess. Chris has been amazing! Poor guy--he has filled the roles of dad, mom, husband, housekeeper, etc... whatever has needed to be done, he has done it. He worked from home all day Friday, caring for both me and Brayden, while I was quarantined to the upstairs. He deserves a medal since we all know caring for a baby is a full-time job!! Way to go, Babe! I appreciate all of your hard work.

Happy 2 months Brayden!

2009-08-01T07:59:00.003-04:00

Brayden turns 2 months old today! Mommy and Daddy are celebrating by having pancake sandwiches (Chris' creation with eggs and bacon in between two pancakes), and Brayden is celebrating by sleeping in and swinging in his swing. We are also going to church tomorrow for the first time since his birth! Woo-hoo! I've been itching to be under some good teaching, but we were waiting for him to be a bit older and to be sleeping through the night. Now is the perfect time. We cannot believe how much bigger he is at 2 months than at one month and certainly than at birth! Of course Chris calls him our future linebacker and says he has "olympian thighs." We will visit the pediatrician on Monday for our 2 mo. well-check and I can't wait to hear how he's grown. But...he will also have his first round of immunizations and I CAN wait for that..not looking forward to the shots. Monday is also my official last day at home with him. I return to school on Tuesday for pre-planning and will have the task of dropping him off at the babysitter's that morning. Don't worry: I am already planning to leave off the mascara until after I get to school. My plan is to work Tues-Thurs and take Friday off so I can be with Brayden. We're being furloughed anyway, so what does it matter?! We'll see how that works. Since I don't have a single thing done yet for school, I will have to maximize my time Tu-Th and forget the socializing. (Translation: close my door). That's so hard to do after not seeing people all summer. Anyway, Happy 2 months Brayden! We sure do love you and thank Jesus for the gift you are in our lives!

Turtles and the Promised Land

2009-07-31T07:25:00.006-04:00

In the early weeks of Brayden's life (and my moments of sheer exhaustion) a good friend of mine encouraged me to keep going, to nap when he napped, to continue to strive for the schedule I'd established because eventually it would pay off: Brayden would begin sleeping through the night and we would enter the "promised land!" Well, we did!!! At 7 weeks, Brayden slept through the night (Hallelujah Chorus playing in the background) and I was afraid he'd been crying for me and I didn't wake up to hear him. Nope. He slept...the whole night. And then we left for P'cola and he slept through the night all week in P'cola. And when we returned home, he continued sleeping through the night. He has even refused his 10pm feeding a few times and slept through the night, going twelve hours between feedings! Can we say CHAMP?! We ARE IN THE PROMISED LAND and it is awesome! I usually get up around 4 or 5, if at all, to change his diaper, but then he wakes like clockwork at 6 for his first feeding of the day and is ready to go back down for his nap by 7:30.

The morning is definitely my favorite time of day with him. When I go in to get him he is bright-eyed and smiling, and full of life. His face is fresh and well-rested and you can tell he's ready to eat and play. A mobile hangs above his crib with animals on it (giraffe, monkey, elephant, and turtle) and he is usually "talking" to the animals when I go in to get him in the morning. I love to hear these sounds. He also has a mobile that hangs over his pack-n-play with only turtles on it and from day one, has been in awe of these little guys. Lately, for whatever reason, he has not spent much time in the pnp (maybe bc he was in it so much in pcola). This morning after he ate, he was propped up on my side looking around (he LOVES to look around)---at the windows, the fan, the curtains. When his eyes met the turtles a big grin came over his face and he began "talking". It was the sweetest thing. I imagined he was saying "Hey guys! What's going on? I've missed you." So I put him in the pnp for awhile and all you could see were the turtles shaking back and forth as Brayden, below, kicked and cooed, watching them all the while. What a guy!
PS: You can't read his t-shirt, but it says "Party in my crib 2 a.m." Not any more!!

Mission Accomplished!

2009-07-22T11:17:00.002-04:00

I was a nervous wreck on Monday. At 7am Brayden and I pulled out of our driveway, headed for Pensacola. Chris had packed the car for me the night before, so after B's 6am feeding, we were ready to go! Did I mention I was a nervous wreck?! The very thought of merging onto 285 made me panic. I don't know what my problem is, other than hormones, and continual adjustment to having a baby, but I am easily overwhelmed. A 5 1/2 hr trip would quickly become a 6 1/2, possibly 7 hr trip with a 7 week old, and for me to be by myself with him was a little scary---what if he had a crying fit? I knew I would be on anxiety overload! I asked everyone to please pray against gas...gas is my biggest fear these days. It sounds silly, but this whole gas dillemna and my fear of it makes me realize what a control freak I am. I probably call the pediatrican's office 2x a week and I did tell the nurse yesterday that I know I am neurotic (in case she thinks I don't know). Anyway...I am happy to report that Brayden did GREAT! He burped appropriately, which gave me peace of mind, and slept nearly the whole way, with the exception of our hour long stop at Chick-Fil-A in Montgomery and some occasional "mom, I'm tired of this carseat" cries. Yeah for Brayden! Yeah for the Chick! and Yeah me for mission accomplished!
PS: Favorite new band, good for road trips: Zac Brown Band...hope you enjoy :)

My sweet, little boy...

2009-07-14T16:42:00.005-04:00

Brayden and I have had some really sweet moments in the past few days. I mentioned in a previous post that I just LOVE when he nuzzles close on my neck as I hold him. This is quite possibly my very favorite! Yesterday I was having a guilty, doubting, second-guessing kind-of day. So what did I do? called my sister. (I am so glad she has already been through all of this so I can text her with my daily entourage of questions.) B seemed especially clingy--wanting me to hold him and not at all satisfied if I left him to nap on his own. Then I realized his skin felt a bit clammy, sweaty in spots. I panicked, thinking "what if he has a fever and I didn't even know?" So...I called Julie. I took his temp 3x under his arm, trying to avoid the recommended rectal reading. His temp was normal, but I was still concerned. So when he woke up from his nap, I took it rectally--he was fine. Whew! But what about the clingy thing? Who knows what that was/is, but I am loving every minute that he wants to cuddle. It has been some of our sweetest time together, as he seems to calm down on hearing my voice and being close. I even read him his first two books. I am already considering the basket case I will be when I have to drop him off at the babysitter's when I return to school. :(

The New "Normal"

2009-07-14T14:50:00.009-04:00

Brayden turned 6 weeks old yesterday! It is hard to believe 6 full weeks have passed since we sat in the hospital, anxious to meet our baby boy, waiting to be called back to our delivery room. What a whirlwind these weeks have been! I remember sitting in the recovery room with Brayden, watching him sleep, thinking "how in the world am I going to take care of him?" and wondering too, just how drastic my life had immediately changed. It changed all right! Nothing is the same. This process of coming into my "new self" as a a new mom has been quite the challenge. At first I kept waiting for "normal" to return, but finally I understand that it never will. I think I thought we'd have this cute new baby and eventually we'd figure out how to work him into our routine, our "normal." Not so! I had a list of books to read and knew I would finish them all since all babies do is eat, sleep and poop. Yeah, right! (Those of you with kids are laughing in agreement). Just as I couldn't have imagined how intense the pain of contractions were, I couldn't have imagined how tired and exhausted I would be on a DAILY basis. I pride myself in how many things I can accomplish in a given day. I love the feeling of setting out to do 10-12 things and knocking them all out, only to repeat the process the following day. While Chris and I have had to learn to relate to each other in new ways, as PARENTS, I have struggled to accept that taking care of a newborn is #1-no easy job, and #2-a full time job, even if the only thing I have to show for at the end of the day is a trash can full of dirty diapers and spit up on my t-shirt. I'm lucky if I shower, and on most days, the clock reads 11 am before I've had a chance to brush my teeth. Wow, is life different!! We love this little bundle though and that's the other part.

We have been so consumed with Brayden (understandably so) that Chris and I have struggled to connect. So in order to aid that, last Saturday we asked the grandparents (Phillips) to babysit so we could go to dinner. What a lovely evening! If we had known before Brayden how precious our time together would be, we wonder if we would have done things differently...but it's hard to anticipate and foresee how a new reality will affect you. It was fun getting ready for our date, as I felt like we were unmarried and dating all over again. I had a new dress to wear and made sure to spray perfume; I felt sort of giddy inside, and nervous too, wondering what important things we would talk about. We went to a fabulous restaurant: The Park Cafe in downtown Duluth. The restaurant is located in an historic house that dates back to 1899. Chris had the salmon, while I opted for shrimp and grits, and we both enjoyed fried green tomatoes as an appetizer. I cried through the whole meal, as I shared with Chris all of my deepest thoughts and fears and struggles that have seemed to surface since Brayden. Love those hormones! We walked around downtown after dinner, holding hands and feeling like two kids who'd suddenly fallen in love. When we got back to the car, I was tempted to call and see how Brayden was doing, but I resisted, knowing our phones would ring if something was wrong. That one night was enough to recharge our batteries. When we returned home, we were both thrilled to see our lil' man and energized to give all over again. Thanks, Grandma and Grandpa P. And thanks Chris for a great date!

Brayden's First Month

2009-07-09T15:11:00.006-04:00

Brayden celebrated his first month of life while we were away in Seacrest Beach, FL. On our trip down, he was able to meet his great grandparents. What a treat to see their excitement over their new great grandchild. We continue to enjoy watching him grow and develop and we relish each and every new detail of his life. Ten things we love and celebrate about Brayden:
1. the way he pokes his bottom lip out just before he bursts into a loud cry
2. his stretching routine that resembles a turtle sticking out its neck
3. his cute, button nose
4. his cooing when he's happy and content
5. his roving eyes of thanksgiving when he gets a diaper change
6. sucking his thumb or first finger while getting a bath
7. the way he nuzzles close to my neck when cuddling on my shoulder
8. his sleeping pattern: usually 5 hrs at night
9. his beautiful smile and occasional giggle during sleep
10. his increasing appetite that says "I'm a healthy, growing boy!"

At 5 weeks, Brayden weighs 10.2 lbs and measures 22 inches long. I love going to the doctor to see how much weight he's gained; it is secretly a feeling of accomplishment as a mom. As I mentioned above, he has found his thumb and it is terribly cute when he sucks it--so noticeably a comfort for him. He is also holding his head up quite well and loves to kick his legs. We're anxious to know what color his eyes will be, as they are ever blue. Will they remain that way or change to Dyster brown? He enjoys bath time with Daddy, and Daddy especially enjoys when Brayden wets his fresh, clean towel while Daddy holds him (and incidently, wets Daddy too!). He has begun to smile a bit at us while he's awake and this absolutely melts our hearts. What a wild ride to become a parent and have your life instantaneously reordered and prioritized!--all for the better.

Tuckered Out

2009-07-05T14:25:00.001-04:00

We returned home from our family trip a day early and exhausted. What a new world it is to travel with a newborn. We were not able to enjoy the beach as much as we thought, but it was nice to get away and have a change of scenery. Brayden did great, but was noticeably ready to come home to his normal environment by mid-week. Additionally, I somehow contracted bacterial pink eye and was "pretty in pink" with a swollen, red eye...nervous that Brayden would also get it. So we packed the car on Friday morning and headed back, making a stop at the CVS Minute Clinic before settling in for the night. It was so nice to be home. This was Brayden's first response to our homecoming.

Hi-ho, Hi-ho, it's off to the BEACH we go...

2009-06-26T16:04:00.002-04:00

We are leaving for the beach tomorrow! I cannot wait. Of course, this will be a new challenge with a baby on board, but we are anxious to get out of the house and have a change of scenery. I'm also thrilled about the prospect of having many loving hearts who wish to hold Brayden. I have a feeling this will be just the refreshment I need. We will stop in P'cola on the way to see my parents and allow B to meet his great gransdparents. Yeah for grandparents, beach and sun!!

Brayden's First Photo Shoot

2009-06-26T15:42:00.006-04:00

I knew I wanted to have newborn pics taken of Brayden, but went back and forth trying to decide on a professional photographer or simplifying life a bit and taking him to Portrait Innovations, where several of my girlfriends have taken their children and been satisfied. On Tuesday I decided to give PI a try. First I must say that going anywhere with a newborn seems like such a chore! I am used to hopping in the car and whirling away to wherever my heart desires...usually Target! But now, I find myself avoiding errands because of the amount of time it takes just to get out of the house, not to mention it necessitates a shower and make-up :). Anyway, I'd made an appointment and allowed extra time to get ourselves ready to go. I have to say, I was terribly nervous that this whole idea of mine would flop. Why was I taking a 3 week old to have pictures made when he will likely cry, wet his diaper, and we'd end up with a roll of either yawns or tears. Brayden was a champ! I was so darn proud of him! He never once cried and the only problem we had was that the pictures were so good, I was overwhelmed with trying to make a decision. I can only make small, minor decisions these days and sifting through nearly 100 photos, trying to select which ones I wanted to purchase was a little much (for me anyway). Here are some of his best shots...hope you enjoy. What a precious little bundle!

Those staring eyes

2009-06-22T17:11:00.002-04:00

Brayden is adorable when he is mesmerized by what he sees. Today, (because I am hardly on the computer anymore) put him in the bouncer beside me so I could watch him while I checked email. I knew a storm was on the horizon, but I had no idea the severity of it. All of a sudden, it was pouring rain and hailing huge chunks of ice. The wind was so strong it blew our grill and patio table over. When I looked at Brayden, he was bright-eyed and staring out the window at the rain. I just knew that he would start to cry when he was startled by the thunder and crack of lightning, but he didn't....he just flinched and kept watching. Here are a few pics of his wandering eyes. So cute!

Better Days...

2009-06-22T16:56:00.002-04:00

So we transitioned Brayden to his room on Saturday night. (I think I posted that it did not go well). After seeking desperate advice from my sister (THANKS, Julz!) we had a MUCH BETTER night last night. For one, I do think his tummy was bothering him on Saturday and so by Sunday, he was feeling better, but the real kicker is the paci! He kept spitting out or "dropping" the all-time coveted paci from Northside Hospital. Knowing these are hot items, we asked for some extra before leaving the hospital. I never thought that maybe he doesn't like it though. Julie suggested I try another one, so Chris picked up a different kind at the store (NUK) and he seems to LOVE it! How crazy! I also think he really likes his room...it is calming, quiet, dark, and soothing...especially when I turn little lamby on and play the ocean sound! (Thanks, Joanne!) Last night I did exactly what "The Book" says :) and put him down for bed immediately after feeding, diaper change and swaddling. He did great--slept for about 4 1/2 hours and was ready to eat again at 3am. Thank you, Brayden. I am very proud of you.
I, on the other hand, am having tremendous headaches and am trying to assess whether I can keep going with breastfeeding or not. I have been off of my migraine meds since 5 weeks pregnant and cannot take them while nursing. In the meantime though, I am in miserable pain that we all know Tylenol and Advil cannot touch! So...you can pray for me for wisdom on that one. We head to the beach this Saturday and I cannot wait! I am looking forward to actually doing some reading, walks on the beach, major sun time (of course!), relishing in the reality of others desiring to care for Brayden, and a date with Chris! YAY! Love to all...

Survival of the fittest

2009-06-21T13:30:00.004-04:00

I know it is hard to believe a face this cute could cause distress and frustration, but it's true: we are officially in SURVIVAL MODE! Brayden has been more than fussy for the past few days, and as a result, we are not sleeping much. While it pains me to see his face turn red while crying, it also exhausts me in playing the guessing game about what could possibly be wrong... Hungry? No. Need a clean diaper? No. Hot or cold? No. Need to be swaddled? No. The list goes on and on and in the meantime, I feel like I'm committing child neglect when I can't accurately respond to his persistent cries. I love his tiny little body nuzzled up to me, but when he wails, I want to run!

Chris has been more than gracious in supporting and helping me out. Last night we tried to transition Brayden to his nursery. It didn't go well. Chris offered to get up with him for his 2am feeding and I quickly said "OK." Of course, there was no "getting up" because we had been up with his crying all night, so by 1:30am I told Chris to go ahead and feed him. In the meantime I fell asleep, only to wake at 6am to crying in the monitor and finding Chris in the bonus room on a pallet of blankets and comforters. He said he was up until 3 with Brayden. I felt terrible for him. O Lord, give us the strength and grace and wisdom to love Brayden well and discern his tears.

Brayden's first outing

2009-06-09T13:00:00.003-04:00

We went to the doctor for B's first check-up on Friday, June 5th. What should have been an hour long doctor's visit, turned into a 4 hour ordeal!! Tired and hungry, we were not happy campers. Brayden needed to be tested for jaundice. It was only after watching him scream when the nurse pricked his heel to collect the blood, and waiting about 10 minutes for the results, were we told "woops! The machine that spins the blood isn't working." Nice! So we ventured to Emory Johns Creek for yet another prick and scream. In the meantime, Chris made a Chick-Fil-A run so we could handle our not-so-diplomatic mouths a little better. It turned out, his level was normal. What a day!!

Happy 1 week birthday!

2009-06-09T11:14:00.005-04:00

Brayden turned 1 week old yesterday. It is hard to believe that a week ago, we were in the hospital, I was in excruciating pain, and within minutes, this little bundle of joy entered our lives and we fell instantly in love! What a blessing he is to us already. In the last week, Brayden has become much more active in stretching his arms and legs, pushing off of daddy with his legs as he holds him, and incredibly alert. Yesterday I placed him in the swing, and turned the lights and sound on to "entertain" him while I did a few things in the kitchen. It was the sweetest thing to watch him stare and study the lights and the colorful fish dangling off to the side. Other things that fascinate Brayden:
1. the rotation of fan blades
2. Chris' glasses
3. Mommy's voice
4. the sound of the hairdryer---a wonder worker!!
We took our first family walk last night after dinner. It was VERY short, but so nice to be outside as it provided some time for Chris and I to connect and talk; B slept the whole way :).
Here are some pics from B's first week...enjoy.

from 2-10 in an hour...Brayden's Birth Story

2009-06-07T13:17:00.000-04:00

I could not have asked for a better labor and delivery. I was very nervous about being induced, actual labor and delivery, and everything else involved with having a baby. I'd been praying all along for a safe, quick and easy delivery and this is exactly what God gave us. Chris and I were admitted to Northside Hospital on Sunday afternoon, May 31, at 4pm. We were expecting a call between 5-8pm, but as soon as we got home from church, the phone rang. The hospital said a room was available and asked if I could be there by 2pm. NO! Mom and I had planned to go shopping! After negotiating a 4pm arrival, mom and I headed to The Avenue to buy a few shoes and stop in Bath and Body works for their semi-annual sale. I look back and laugh because I knew I was subconsciously taking advantage of my last moment of "freedom."
After being admitted, the process of childbirth began with the nurse who blew my vein as she manuevered the needle for my IV. Now I have a rainbow of colorful bruising on my wrist. The whole point to going in the night before was to receive Cervidol, a medicated shoestring, if you will, that helps the cervix soften and efface. I received the Cervidol around 6pm and the cramps started almost immediately. They were so intense that I received a shot of morphine in my leg around midnight so I could sleep. But...I had no idea the pain I was yet to experience the following morning! When they started the pitocin drip, around 7:30am, I was 70% effaced and 2 cm. We knew to expect a long day...anticipating the arrival of our boy around 5-6pm. BUT everyone is different! The pitocin sent me into active labor, with my water breaking on its own around 8:30am. At 9:03am I was 5cm and at 9:04, was 6cm. My plan was to ask for the epidural around 5 or 6, but thinking I was still at 2cm, I hadn't asked. No one can prepare you for that kind of pain; I wanted to hit someone just to release some of the intensity. By the time I did get the epidural I was already around 7 or 8cm and progressing quickly. Chris, who never misses a meal, finally went to McDonald's to get breakfast, feeling fine to leave me since the epidural had kicked in. By the time he returned, I was at 10. Since we were waiting for the doctor to return to start pushing, he hopped in the shower! As soon as he got out, the nurse said "Where's Dad? We're ready!" I pushed for 25 minutes and Baby Brayden was born at 11:16am...a far stretch from the 5-6pm timeframe we were expecting! The funny thing is that I fainted in the middle of it all. I remember feeling dizzy and then just passed out. I woke up to an oxygen mask and four faces in my face yelling "Amy! Push!" The next thing I knew, little Brayden was born, perfectly formed, beautiful, and crying! Thank you Jesus for a safe, quick and easy delivery, and a healthy baby boy. :)

Home and Healthy...and TIRED!

2009-06-03T20:25:00.005-04:00

Brayden, Chris and I arrived home this afternoon around 2:30pm. We are all very tired and glad to be out of the hospital, where it seemed like someone was knocking on the door every 12 seconds :). Brayden's color has continued to "ripen" and he is looking more dark complected than we originally thought. He really is a beautiful baby! We are adjusting to the addition of this gracious gift God has given us and looking forward to establishing new routines...centered around him of course! More later on the whole experience of birth, but God was so gracious in allowing it to be smooth, fast, and easy. Praise Him for that!! Love to all...enjoy the pics. I will post more later.

Welcome Baby Brayden!!

2009-06-01T20:46:00.005-04:00

The Flying Biscuit, Swan House, and Tulle Smith Farm

2009-05-31T09:08:00.000-04:00

Tourists for a day!

2009-05-31T08:31:00.003-04:00

My mom arrived at noon on Saturday and Chris and I had the idea of going to eat somewhere "exotic" and doing some touristy things. So...we decided to go to the original Flying Biscuit Cafe in Chandler Park and then make our way to The Swan House at the Atlanta History Center in the heart of Buckhead. I'd read Elizabeth Musser's The Swan House and was fascinated by the history behind the first Buckhead mansion. The tickets at the AHC included the museum, a tour of the gardens (33 acres), Tulle Smith Farm, and The Swan House. The day could not have been nicer in terms of weather. The sun was bright and shining, the breeze was custom-ordered and it was overall nice to be out of the house, where I would become anxious, dwelling on the unknown of being induced and having a baby.

The Swan House was incredible! Philip Schutze, a prominent Atlanta architect, was commissioned to build the house in 1928, as a permanent residence and retirement location for Edward and Emily Inman, a well-to-do couple who made their early fortune in the cotton broverage business. The 13,000 sq.ft. house sits on 28 acres of land, cared for at the time by ONE gardener and a team of indoor servants. The name stems from its style of European elegance, which incorporates the swan motif both indoor and out. Interestingly, the Inman's paid $106,000 cash for the house at a time when the avg. home cost was $5,000 and gas was 12 cents a gallon!! Today, the land alone is worth over $56 million!!! If you are ever in ATL or if you live here like us and have not taken advantage of all the sights you can see, make it a point to visit the Swan House. For more info, click here: http://www.atlantahistorycenter.com/cms/Swan+House/116.html

Monday it is!!

2009-05-29T15:17:00.002-04:00

I saw the doc this morning and I am 25% effaced and ALMOST 2 cm dialated. We will induce on Monday morning, but I will be admitted on Sunday night to get things started and then begin the pitocin drip around 5-6am Monday. Mom comes tomorrow, so that is squared away and I am just doing last minute things to get ready (although I think I've done everything twice). Pray for a safe, quick and easy delivery. I am very nervous it will be long and hard! Love to all.

Slow Mo

2009-05-26T20:58:00.003-04:00

Brayden is not in a hurry and I have never had such intense back pain. A week ago when the doc asked me "was I so miserable that I was ready to induce", I said "No. Uncomfortable, but not absolutely, hands-down miserable." Today I am!!! I cannot take a step without a pain shooting up my back. I swear Tylenol does not do a thing, but I am taking it every four hours, in HOPES that it will alleviate SOME of the intensity. I tried sleeping in the recliner last night---that lasted about 30 minutes. I had to get up every couple of minutes to use the restroom and the darn chair would practically snap shut, leaving my back in more pain and catapulting me into an upright position. A good idea, but no go. So, back to the roll-in, roll-out routine of getting into and out of the bed. I am grateful to have had a really easy, pleasant pregnancy, but "Rent's up Brayden! Time to enter the real world!" My mom is coming on Saturday, so that will be perfect for either a weekend delivery or a Monday induction. In the meantime, I wait and make myself busy.

Nursery Update

2009-05-22T22:32:00.000-04:00

I've been meaning to post pictures of the nursery and haven't done it. Here they are... We had a few maternity pics taken and I was waiting to hang them in Brayden's room. Last night, I got ambitious and decided to do it myself while Chris was away. It's not the most accurate hang job, but hey, it's done, right? They're a bit higher than I had planned, but that is my own anxious fault. See the "Oh Boy!" sign? That is an added touch, compliments of Aunt Julie. Thanks, Julz.

39 weeks...and counting the days...

2009-05-22T21:57:00.002-04:00

So here is my cute hair cut that I am now happy with...and my watermelon belly that is only continuing to grow heavier by the day! I went to the doc yesterday and she thinks Baby Brayden is about 7 1/2 lbs right now. AGH...that sort of scares me. I am only 1 cm dialated and little Brayden seems quite content with his current home. His mother, however, is suffering from tremendous back and hip pain. Chris and I have both informed Brayden of this, in hopes of encouraging him to "come on down." :) While I am feeling very ready to have this baby, it has been gracious of God to allow me to get through the school year. Today was the last day with the kids and let me just say, I would not have made it another day. I am in need of some much needed rest, away from 150 teenagers. So now that school's out and my grades are done, we are ready. Any day. My doctor did say that if Brayden does not arrive sometime next week, she will induce on Monday, June 1st. That makes me feel good because there is an end in sight. In the meantime, I plan to stay busy to pass the time. Pray for a safe, quick, easy, and healthy delivery. We'll be in touch...

37 weeks

2009-05-16T21:49:00.003-04:00

Sunday is our day for pictures. Here's the one we took last week. Yesterday, I took the day off of school for a doctor's appt and an "Amy Day"--had my hair cut--SHORT, and treated myself to a manicure and pedicure. It's been so long since I've enjoyed either of those luxuries. I'd forgotten what a great feeling it is to have your nails done! Anyway, I had a couple of emotional breakdowns later in the afternoon over my hair. Chris, ever the patient and loving husband, was great to listen and console me. There was no denying though, I felt like a "mushroom-head." So...I went back to the salon today to have the cut tweaked. It looks much better now. Pics coming soon...hope you like it. I kind of miss the length, but at least I no longer look like a Strawberry Shortcake bobble-head. :)

Like Sister, Like Sister

2009-05-15T17:27:00.003-04:00

The last month of Julie's pregnancy with Aubrey she blogged about craving ice cream. I cannot eat ice cream since it sends my stomach into havoc, BUT I do love some TCBY!!! The unfortunate part is that there are hardly ANY TCBY's around the Atlanta area. Bruster's has taken over the market and I am not a huge Bruster's fan. Anyway, this whole pregnancy I've been amazed at what I have had absolutely NO appetite for (some of my favorite things): Peanut butter, chocolate, and frozen yogurt! BUT---third trimester hit and about half-way through it, I really wanted, for the first time in about 9 months a PBJ. This was a good sign, I thought, since maybe my eating habits/tastes were beginning to return. In the last 2 weeks, I have wanted frozen yogurt nearly every night. I've not had it, of course, BUT I have thought my sis in her own cravings. Maybe we'll scout out a TCBY tonight. In the meantime, Publix has excellent frozen yogurt!

Showered by Students

2009-05-11T13:31:00.004-04:00

One week ago my fifth period class threw me a surprise baby shower. First you have to understand that this class has been a thorn in my side for almost the duration of the school year. The class started with 32 students and by the grace and mercy of God, it has shrunk to 29. Consider 29 11th grade teenagers, right after lunch, in a confined space, smelly from having eaten outside, and high on sugar!! This is my classroom from 1:30-2:30pm. I have been more mean and sarcastic than I ever thought possible in this class, yet somehow I love these 29 kids who don't understand what it means to "sit down and close your mouths." On Friday, May 1 I walked into class a few minutes late, only to find a room fully decorated with "It's a BOY" paraphrenalia and "Congrats!" and blue balloons, and a cake that read "Congratulations Mrs. Phil! We love you!" They had been planning this event for over a month! Not only did we eat cake, but they had an agenda: blindfold the teacher, feed her 6 selections of baby food, and make her guess what she's eating. :) I did well--scoring 4/6. On top of that, they had collected money and purchased gifts for me and Brayden. Additionally, some girls got together to make me a t-shirt that read "Y'all are SO LOUD!", which is what I must say about every 5 minutes when they have independent work to be working on. What a fun memory!! Thanks, 5th period!

35 weeks

2009-04-26T16:27:00.002-04:00

I am officially tired of being pregnant. How women go through this four and more times, I do not know. It is beginning to get hot here in ATL and Praise Jesus I will not be preggers in mid-July!! My biggest issue, small as it may be, is sleeping (which I have just had the joy of taking Tylenol PM) and simply being uncomfortable. I would LOVE to breathe again. :) But, at the risk of sounding like a hige complainer, I will stop. I realize and appreciate the beauty and miracle of being pregnant and having a child and we are thrilled about his arrival. When you think of it though, please pray for me. I am struggling with feeling overwhelmed with all there is to do to get ready for Baby Brayden and to close out the school year. When I begin to list all the details with school that must be completed, followed by a May 30 due date, I want to crawl in a hole, afraid I won't have everything finished or ready. But, one step at a time.... I did grade a LOAD of projects today and that's a huge relief!

Baby Shower #2

2009-04-22T21:05:00.001-04:00

Last weekend, my sister traveled up from Tallahassee, FL to make sure I had a superb baby shower. Julie, with the help of Barbara Phillips and Lashan Wolfe, put together a wonderful morning of food, friends, and fun. It was so fun to see several friends I've not seen in awhile (for various reasons) and open gifts for Brayden. Thanks Julz, Lash, and Barb for a phenomenal morning!! The coffee "punch" was a hit! Chris and I are grateful to all for your generosity in giving and your prayers for our little Brayden. We grow excited and nervous for the day of his arrival.

My latest creation...like it?

2009-03-12T21:37:00.002-04:00

Love the pillow---Target $2

2009-03-12T21:36:00.002-04:00